Why do certain reviewers feel compelled to give us a second by second account of EVERYTHING that happens in a porn flick? Some are worse than others but there are around three so-called "respected reviewers" who use more words than that which are in War and Peace.
No names mentioned, but one guy wrote 1,625 words about Service Animals (I popped it through my word count). <img src="/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/confused.gif" alt="" /> <img src="/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/piss.gif" alt="" />
I mean, who bothers to read all that crap? <img src="/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/barf3.gif" alt="" />
For my own part, I like to know the basics of what's in a movie, but the whole joy of watching porn is that you're not sure what's cumming next. <img src="/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/grin.gif" alt="" />
Agree or disagree? <img src="/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/smokin.gif" alt="" />
Regards, Rump. <img src="/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/cool.gif" alt="" />

Here's the bottom line Rump: they write these never ending reviews to compensate for a lack of attention they recieve in the real world. Also, some of these reviewers feel that if they lick enough ass that maybe they'll somehow win the favor of a studio, producer or director. Sad <img src="/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/dudepissin.gif" alt="" />

You're probably right, Owen. <img src="/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/grin.gif" alt="" />
But when reviews like this are posted on the web, surely there is no hope:
"Cute little Ashley Blue is hitchhiking when she is picked up by Joey and gorgeous Brandon Iron. She looks very hot in her skimpy red top, short skirt and crinsined shoes. The sexy little brat lets Joey check her out right in the back of the car.I am not sure what make the car was but it was very nice anyway. Joey, wearing blue jeans, chokes her and shoves fingers into her mouth. This footage is a little manic for me and doesn't really offer much, but I liked it. They get to a garage where Sledgehammer joins the fun. Sledgehammer is wearing blue jeans, a white T-shirt and had a tattoo on his inner neck, just one inch from his ear lobes. Ashley looks very cute, but Brandon starts the action by spitting on her face. That bores me, but watching her try and get Sledge's big prick into her little mouth is pretty damn hot. They hold her hands behind her head and she starts to do a great job of deep throating Brandon's lovely ripe cock when he holds her nose. Whoever orders this, stop it. It's well stupid. If a hot chick is sucking a nice dick, don't block our view of her face just to get tears running down her face. I don't like it, and I want stand for it. Not now, not then not in the future!!!! I'm not sure about the balloons tied around her neck either, that's just strange. Now that the blowjob footage has been sufficiently ruined, it's time to watch this babe try and fit Sledge into her tight pussy. At this point they have removed all clothing expect for Brandon's white panties. That part is great, but Brandon is still exercising his personal demons on her mouth. It's a lot better when he is out of the way, pounding her pussy as Sledge fucks her face. This way she can really be tested without all the nonsense. There is some nice anal footage with the guys taking turns on Ashley's bum.." and so on for another 1,000 words....!!!!!! <img src="/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/afraid5.gif" alt="" /> <img src="/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/eek.gif" alt="" /> <img src="/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/eek.gif" alt="" />
Regards, Rump. <img src="/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/egypt.gif" alt="" />