Brandon Irons Skank Reliquary
Posted by: Gunker
Brandon Irons Skank Reliquary - 06/08/08 08:34 PM
Erika:
Andrea Wild:
Kaylee Hunter:
Morgan:
Missy Grahem:
Sophia Layne:
Alexis Blaze:
Kate:
Chii (prounounced "Shy"):
Posted by: NitneLiun
Re: Brandon Irons Skank Reliquary - 06/08/08 09:14 PM
I have no complaints with Andrea Wild, but you are right on target with the rest of your post.
Posted by: *L*G*
Re: Brandon Irons Skank Reliquary - 06/08/08 09:18 PM
Posted by: Anonymous
Re: Brandon Irons Skank Reliquary - 06/08/08 09:19 PM
One-Stop shopping, EL G?
Posted by: *L*G*
Re: Brandon Irons Skank Reliquary - 06/08/08 10:38 PM
or Doneky-Steal-Knox garage-bedroom
Posted by: Brandon_Iron
Re: Brandon Irons Skank Reliquary - 06/09/08 02:28 AM
There is no such thing as a bad blowjob. Learn it. Live it. Love it.
For those who can't abide by these 3 simple rules, the July 20th, 2008 update for
www.loadmymouth.com will make you blow chunks rather than your load. I set a new standard with this one that makes me believe I no longer have any shame.
After July 20th, I will admit defeat and let the ugly stick hit all in its path. Until then, I invite you all to go fuck yourselves.
Quote:
There is no such thing as a bad blowjob.
Too much teeth and biting.
Posted by: Bluecipher
Re: Brandon Irons Skank Reliquary - 06/09/08 05:18 AM
Quote:
Quote:
There is no such thing as a bad blowjob.
Too much teeth and biting.
Metal braces
Quote:
There is no such thing as a bad blowjob.
So that's why you keep hiring Knox...
Posted by: Dick Dastardly
Re: Brandon Irons Skank Reliquary - 06/09/08 12:40 PM
Quote:
Alexis Blaze:
WOW, if Hailey Young have a five head, this girl must be at least a 6!
Posted by: Dick Dastardly
Re: Brandon Irons Skank Reliquary - 06/09/08 12:49 PM
Quote:
Quote:
There is no such thing as a bad blowjob.
Too much teeth and biting.
Hey, if it scrapes the bubbling sores off one's rancid prick, how could anyone find wrong in that?
Posted by: John West Fan
Re: Brandon Irons Skank Reliquary - 06/09/08 05:46 PM
GAHHHHHHHHHHH!!!
Doesn't one need to meet some sort of minimum requirement to get into porn these days? It used to be the girls were uniformly good (or at worst, not too homely)looking but you had to take their scuzzy boyfriends as part of the deal. Now anyone with a pulse can become a porn "actress".
Between the pictures above and that creature from the Christian XXX thread, porn has become a freak show.
Brandon, with all the beauties you've appeared with over the years, how can you even keep it up for dog meat like this????
Posted by: xvod
Re: Brandon Irons Skank Reliquary - 06/09/08 06:24 PM
Isn't this just a statement about the type of chicks getting into porn these days? The vast majority of them are just plain nasty and wouldn't get the pleasure of blowing my tool - not even for free. The fucked up part is that these nasty chicks are getting paid the going rate.
Unless some hot chicks start showing up to be degraded for cash, the industry is dead.
Posted by: Brandon_Iron
Re: Brandon Irons Skank Reliquary - 06/09/08 08:23 PM
I don't want to get into any big debate over who is hot and who is not. I truly, honestly, and sincerely appreciate interviewing young ladies who are willing to swallow cum. That's it. That's all. I love hearing about their backgrounds, their experiences, and how they wound up in front of the camera.
I doubt if I will ever get tired of this and have paid my dues for long enough to give me the right to do what gets me off.
Some people would say
www.crackwhoreconfessions.com would fail, too....but it doesn't. True reality is a turn-on in all its brutally nasty forms. As long as the women with whom I work are cool with me, I want to hear their stories and enjoy my time with them. Most will not go on to careers in the business but some will. I've shot Monica Sweetheart, Brianna Love, Gianna, Mia Rose, Natasha Nice, Mackenzie Pierce, Chelsie Rae, Raveness, Bobbi Starr, Riley Shy, Faye Valentine, Bree Olson, Lexi Belle, Jenna Presley, Alektra Blue, Jasmine Tame, Sasha Grey, Amber Rayne, Maya Hills, Rebeca Linares, Delilah Strong, Courtney Simpson, Faith, Jamie Huxley, Tiffany Rayne, Karina Kay, Sasha Knox, Courtney Cummz, Venus, Sharka Blue, and many, many more.
Posted by: Bornyo
Re: Brandon Irons Skank Reliquary - 06/09/08 09:53 PM
Quote:
...I've shot Monica Sweetheart, Brianna Love, Gianna, Mia Rose, Natasha Nice, Mackenzie Pierce, Chelsie Rae, Raveness, Bobbi Starr, Riley Shy, Faye Valentine, Bree Olson, Lexi Belle, Jenna Presley, Alektra Blue, Jasmine Tame, Sasha Grey, Amber Rayne, Maya Hills, Rebeca Linares, Delilah Strong, Courtney Simpson, Faith, Jamie Huxley, Tiffany Rayne, Karina Kay, Sasha Knox, Courtney Cummz, Venus, Sharka Blue, and many, many more.
That's a pretty good list for CAL-OSHA to start with.
Posted by: Brandon_Iron
Re: Brandon Irons Skank Reliquary - 06/09/08 10:04 PM
My name is Brandon, not Cal.
Also, whenever I am in doubt as to the status of a woman, I simply read her tats:
I don't want you to have to rip me a new one if I make a mistake.
I simply want to go to work and relieve some stress. You should try it.
Posted by: BIFF™
Re: Brandon Irons Skank Reliquary - 06/10/08 08:09 PM
Seems like chicks will do anything to get herpes nowadays.
Posted by: Brandon_Iron
Re: Brandon Irons Skank Reliquary - 06/10/08 08:33 PM
They are called bug chasers. Buzzzzzzzzzz off before I pop you like a blister. I'm trying to enjoy the Lakers.
Posted by: elaborator
Re: Brandon Irons Skank Reliquary - 06/10/08 08:40 PM
Quote:
That's a pretty good list for CAL-OSHA to start with.
i laughed out loud. 
Posted by: xvod
Re: Brandon Irons Skank Reliquary - 06/11/08 12:55 AM
Quote:
I don't want to get into any big debate over who is hot and who is not...
Dude, do what your going to do, but look at it this way. Back a few years ago when Lexus was building it's brand, all of the parts said Toyota on them. It made every Lexus owner (myself included) think they got ripped off. What did Toyota do? They stamped all the fucking parts Lexus so buyers would go 'I'm so cool driving a $50K Lexus' instead of 'I got screwed paying $50k for a Toyota.'
You have paid your dues. At this point you should be looking at quality, not quantity. Learn it, live it, love it. If the average jerk-off (consumer) has to decide how he's going to spend twenty-some bucks a month, he's going for the site with the hotter chicks. By banging Plain-Jane skanks any Joe Blow can pick up in a bar after a twelve-pak, all you are doing is reducing your value, marketability and income.
It's basic business 101...
Posted by: Brandon_Iron
Re: Brandon Irons Skank Reliquary - 06/11/08 02:16 AM
I am a pervert, not a businessman. When the iron says "Strike!" I listen to it.
I also listen to stats like reorders. I'm doing more than fine, according to Jeff. I listen to the guys at Braincash when they say the sites convert in the top 5 of the 50 on the network.
This is a marathon, not a sprint. Biology tells me to spread as much seed as possible.
Am I the only one who thinks that Missy Graham is a hot piece of ass??
Posted by: freestylah
Re: Brandon Irons Skank Reliquary - 06/11/08 05:01 AM
Quote:
Am I the only one who thinks that Missy Graham is a hot piece of ass??
Hate to disappoint you, but, yeah, I'm afraid you're the only one fancying this girl(?).
Posted by: Anonymous
Re: Brandon Irons Skank Reliquary - 06/11/08 05:10 AM
Quote:
You have paid your dues. At this point you should be looking at quality, not quantity. Learn it, live it, love it. If the average jerk-off (consumer) has to decide how he's going to spend twenty-some bucks a month, he's going for the site with the hotter chicks. By banging Plain-Jane skanks any Joe Blow can pick up in a bar after a twelve-pak, all you are doing is reducing your value, marketability and income.
It's basic business 101...
To continue with this line of reasoning, the average jerk-off probably doesn't know as much about porn as the average XPT poster. You've been around long enough that he's probably heard your name somewhere, though he doesn't know that much about your product. On that basis alone, he decides to give one of your sites a look. He sees quality whores, he needs to look no further and you've cemented the deal. he sees some of the skanks above, his money's going to someone else.
Posted by: Brandon_Iron
Re: Brandon Irons Skank Reliquary - 06/11/08 03:16 PM
I rarely beg but today I beg to differ.
Someone enjoys this stuff. I could not afford to keep going otherwise.
I'm fine with the criticism and all but it reminds me of people on late night tv giving stock tips. If it was that easy, everyone would be rich. The truth is that it's not that easy, porn or stocks. The people who do well are the ones that buy when people are scrambling to get out of the market. For porn, I am just following my gut and enjoying the ride for as long as it lasts. I am not scrambling to "sell" anytime soon, trust me.
Missy and her magic mouth are pure pleasure.
Posted by: wannacorndog
Re: Brandon Irons Skank Reliquary - 06/11/08 03:27 PM
Quote:
Am I the only one who thinks that Missy Graham is a hot piece of ass??
I thought only Frank Perdue liked thighs that size
Seriously, if you are happy and making a living then that is all that matters.If they ain't got open festering sores on their mouth there isn't any such thing as a bad blowjob but there are a few of the chicks pictured that kind of push the envelope for me.All in all you have an enviable job Mr Irons.
Posted by: Brandon_Iron
Re: Brandon Irons Skank Reliquary - 06/11/08 05:01 PM
Where others see flaws, I see what's good. Great pedicured feet, toe rings, nail polish, nice smile, beautiful hair....and she swallows.
Being a glass-half-full guy feels good.
Posted by: BIFF™
Re: Brandon Irons Skank Reliquary - 06/11/08 05:18 PM
Posted by: LouCypher
Re: Brandon Irons Skank Reliquary - 06/11/08 05:38 PM
That bitch is tore up BI... Not a bad face though.
Posted by: Fuk Yo Mama
Re: Brandon Irons Skank Reliquary - 06/11/08 05:54 PM
She is probably hotter than any woman you have ever had. Shut up and go away.
Posted by: LouCypher
Re: Brandon Irons Skank Reliquary - 06/11/08 06:15 PM
Quote:
She is probably hotter than any woman you have ever had. Shut up and go away.
How bout you assign a number to your hate. 1-10. Keep it to yourself then ponder this.
No matter how much I've pissed you off my internet personality has worked it's way so far into your fragile psyche that you can't bring yourself to fully accuse me of
being a guy that can pull what I described as a whore with decent looks. It's safe to say that LouCypher has impacted yet another life. Go Me!
Congrats on the 6 minute response time no-lifer. You're gettin there.
Posted by: Fuk Yo Mama
Re: Brandon Irons Skank Reliquary - 06/11/08 06:52 PM
You are probably going to tell this story to your dungeons and dragons friends aren't you?
What level are you and how many hit points?
Posted by: RyanKnox
Re: Brandon Irons Skank Reliquary - 06/11/08 07:23 PM
My guess was leaning more towards Magic the Gathering. With every insult he posts, he gains one honorary Mana.
Posted by: LouCypher
Re: Brandon Irons Skank Reliquary - 06/11/08 07:42 PM
How bout you two stop "accidentaly" dropping the soap around each other and stfu.
You fucken queers have inexplicably decided that outing each other as terminal six sided die grabbing ballbag man-gropers might make you socially acceptable.
Lawl...
Circle the daisy chain faggots.. Hells come to town.
Posted by: Fuk Yo Mama
Re: Brandon Irons Skank Reliquary - 06/11/08 08:41 PM
Tell the truth, you love the attention don't you? You like that anybody is actually communicating with you. It's not our fault that nobody loves you.
Eat another bowl of ice cream and have a good cry. It's just going to be the same thing tomorrow.
Posted by: Willie D
Re: Brandon Irons Skank Reliquary - 06/11/08 08:42 PM
Quote:
terminal six sided die grabbing ballbag man-gropers might make you socially acceptable.
Shit, we're gonna have to start collecting phrases like this.
Posted by: LouCypher
Re: Brandon Irons Skank Reliquary - 06/11/08 08:53 PM
Quote:
Tell the truth, you love the attention don't you? You like that anybody is actually communicating with you. It's not our fault that nobody loves you.
Eat another bowl of ice cream and have a good cry. It's just going to be the same thing tomorrow.
lol...what, turd?
Not even close..
Posted by: damaged
Re: Brandon Irons Skank Reliquary - 06/12/08 05:45 AM
Quote:
I am a pervert, not a businessman. When the iron says "Strike!" I listen to it.
I also listen to stats like reorders. I'm doing more than fine, according to Jeff. I listen to the guys at Braincash when they say the sites convert in the top 5 of the 50 on the network.
This is a marathon, not a sprint. Biology tells me to spread as much seed as possible.
Am I the only one who thinks that Missy Graham is a hot piece of ass??
WTF is wrong with the thighs? Looks like this pig has stretch marks all the way to her knees.
Posted by: RyanKnox
Re: Brandon Irons Skank Reliquary - 06/12/08 12:22 PM
Quote:
Not even close..
Ok then. You're a Warcraft guy.
Hey that's cool. Nothing wrong with that.
Posted by: freestylah
Re: Brandon Irons Skank Reliquary - 06/12/08 02:39 PM
Kill the broccoli....
Posted by: RenfieldGyps
Re: Brandon Irons Skank Reliquary - 06/12/08 07:21 PM
Quote:
Quote:
I am a pervert, not a businessman. When the iron says "Strike!" I listen to it.
I also listen to stats like reorders. I'm doing more than fine, according to Jeff. I listen to the guys at Braincash when they say the sites convert in the top 5 of the 50 on the network.
This is a marathon, not a sprint. Biology tells me to spread as much seed as possible.
Am I the only one who thinks that Missy Graham is a hot piece of ass??
WTF is wrong with the thighs? Looks like this pig has stretch marks all the way to her knees.
I thought they were bruises, they look purplish.
All a girl needs to look good BI is a mani/pedi. I thought that was automatic when you do a scene? Ya know a bath, a douche, a mani/pedi, waxed brows, shaved pussy/ass, brushed teeth, just the basics.
Posted by: gia jordan
Re: Brandon Irons Skank Reliquary - 06/12/08 07:30 PM
i always feel like brandon's girls need to go outback and ran through a pressure washer before they get on camera.
Posted by: Dick Dastardly
Re: Brandon Irons Skank Reliquary - 06/12/08 07:41 PM
Quote:
Isn't this just a statement about the type of chicks getting into porn these days?
Guys, these are wanna-be whores who are willing to swallow nut to gain their 15 minutes of smut fame. With looks only a mother could love, who's to say they're going any further in the industry than Brandon's yellow-walled studio/apartment?
If it weren't for 10 tons of makeup on the faces of 50% of porn whores, I think you'd find that many of them look the same underneath.
Quote:
If they ain't got open festering sores on their mouth...
Give it time. If not from Brandon, Steve Holmes will be happy to accommodate. After all, Mia lasted what? 2 years, and she's done performing. Whorlary Scott is still going strong, even if only a contract whore now.
Posted by: RenfieldGyps
Re: Brandon Irons Skank Reliquary - 06/12/08 08:45 PM
Quote:
i always feel like brandon's girls need to go outback and ran through a pressure washer before they get on camera.
So glad Im not alone always criticizing his girls, they always look like they need a loofah for the first layer to come off, always, always fucking dirty. Pressure washer is perfect, either that or send then thru a car wash. 
Posted by: Brandon_Iron
Re: Brandon Irons Skank Reliquary - 06/12/08 08:56 PM
It's all about the swallow. Don't forget it. Look at this little scamp, wallowing in my filth and loving it.
Posted by: Willie D
Re: Brandon Irons Skank Reliquary - 06/12/08 09:19 PM
Yeah, and not knowing she's doomed to a life of oral herpes...way to go shithole.
Posted by: BIFF™
Re: Brandon Irons Skank Reliquary - 06/13/08 12:14 AM
Herpe boy fucks anything with a hairy back.
Posted by: Brandon_Iron
Re: Brandon Irons Skank Reliquary - 06/13/08 01:14 AM
Biff, meet Limp Willie. You two have a lot in common. Maybe you should go out, have a drink, and be angry at all the people in the bar enjoying themselves.
BAWWWWW HAAAHHHHH HAAHHHHHH!!!!
Keep scowling, boys, and don't forget to wag your fingers in a VERY disapproving manner. That's important. You've really slowed me down. I was only able to shoot 6 updates this week. Please ease up on me. I can't (snicker) take it anymore!! Mercy!! Mercy!!!
Limp Willie: You do, uh, realize that your omnipotence as moderator of one corner of a porn message board evaporates quicker than your fajita-fuelled farts? Your legacy will be a bunch of meaningless, inconsequential rants, sport.
I'm going to go work on the 400th update for
www.loadmymouth.com now.
Posted by: Willie D
Re: Brandon Irons Skank Reliquary - 06/13/08 09:49 AM
Brandon Irons posting images of Simpsons characters at 1:14 a.m. to prove his point = he got owned.
How are those five different strains of herpes doing today?
Posted by: BIFF™
Re: Brandon Irons Skank Reliquary - 06/13/08 10:48 AM
Quote:
Biff, meet Limp Willie. blah, blah, blah, blah.
BLAAAAAHHHHH BLAAAAAHHHHH BLAAAAAHHHHH!!!!
blah, blah, blah, blah.
I guess you fail to realize you PAY those whores to accept your STD riddled seed. Otherwise, they'd take one look at you and 
Posted by: Brandon_Iron
Re: Brandon Irons Skank Reliquary - 06/13/08 12:27 PM
Dr. Willie: Please list the 5 strains. Spelling counts, too, Mr. Magoo, so don't try to fake it. I should be the expert on the subject but I defer to your judgment because I honestly didn't know there were 5 strains.
Biff: You're boring. You hopscotch from STDs to somehow making it a putdown that I pay for some fine onscreen acting. That's bizarre to me. You go to a restaurant, you pay for a meal. You go to a car dealer, you pay for a car. You enjoy time with a woman, you pay her to show your appreciation.
By extension, Larry Flynt and Hugh Hefner must be bigger chumps, right? I mean, look at all that money those suckas had to pay for women to take their clothes off.
Just be honest with yourself and delve into the deep end (if there is one) of your fragile psyche to find out what bothers you about this whole thing. You don't stick with one line of putdowns, sir, and this concerns me. You vascillate....and not very well, I might add. Yes, we know your thoughts immediately went towards Vaseline and all the 5-finger-fun you've had with that Costco-sized jar beside your single bed. Focus, man. Focus!
I would stay and argue but I have to go to "work" now. Be like Ralph Wiggum and eat some paste. Share with Limp Willie if you feel like it. You can both take mouthfuls and gross each other out like kids as you play Load My Mouth. First one to swallow wins!
Posted by: Brandon_Iron
Re: Brandon Irons Skank Reliquary - 06/13/08 12:32 PM
Quote:
Brandon Irons posting images of Simpsons characters at 1:14 a.m. to prove his point = he got owned.
In Limp Willie Land, the rules of logic don't apply. The headline in his mental paper today was: LAKERS LOSE GAME 4 TO CELTICS. LIMP WILLIE DOES ONE-MAN VICTORY PARADE DOWN SUNSET TO CELEBRATE NBA CHAMPIONSHIP WIN.
You just don't make sense, sir. If this is the extent of your "duties" as moderator, I feel sorry for you. The pressure must be intense as you are starting to crack.
Posted by: Willie D
Re: Brandon Irons Skank Reliquary - 06/13/08 02:32 PM
Brandon Irons is melting down,
Melting down,
Melting down.
Brandon Irons is melting down,
He has herpes.
(sing to the tune of "London Bridge")
Posted by: Jigaloo
Re: Brandon Irons Skank Reliquary - 06/13/08 02:37 PM
You deserve an Emmy or whatever stupid fucking awards they hand out for music.
Posted by: Brandon_Iron
Re: Brandon Irons Skank Reliquary - 06/13/08 03:23 PM
Not melting down in the least, my friend. The blowjobs keep me stable and busy the same way being a jackass keeps you...uh...."busy."
Life partner to Limp Wille: Hey, hon. How was your day?
Limp Willie: Great! I so burned some people online today. Man, I am really getting ahead over at that message board. There's a rumor going around that I may be promoted to....well, actually I've about hit the glass ceiling for now. I'm just going to hone my skills some more so that one day I can....I can....hey, pass the Elmer's. I need a toot.
I think all that paste you've eaten has made you "loopy" to borrow a word from the late great Wanker Wang. Please go back to sniffing the fumes instead of eating peanut butter and paste sandwiches. I know you were scarred for life after eating Biff's PB&J only to find out the J stood for jizz but c'mon, man! You gotta stay strong. I believe in you. Don't throw away all those years of education that it took to become a moderator.
And the 5 strains are??? (crickets chirping) Oops! London Bridge finally fell down under the weight of all your bullshit.
Can you at least take Biff out for a meal? He won't shut up about not having money to buy hookers. I am worried he doesn't have 2 nickels to rub together. As you and I both know, desperate people do desperate things.
Posted by: Brandon_Iron
Re: Brandon Irons Skank Reliquary - 06/13/08 03:35 PM
Quote:
You deserve an Emmy or whatever stupid fucking awards they hand out for music.
I think you mean Grammy, as in "Grammy, why do you touch me there? I don't like it." Remember that? I know. I know. The pain is too much. Better to forget that awful birthday party when you were 5.
I am sorry your Grandmother was an incestuous pedophile. May she rest in peace. Don't worry, it's not always hereditary.
Posted by: Willie D
Re: Brandon Irons Skank Reliquary - 06/13/08 04:43 PM
Quote:
Quote:
You deserve an Emmy or whatever stupid fucking awards they hand out for music.
I think you mean Grammy, as in "Grammy, why do you touch me there? I don't like it." Remember that? I know. I know. The pain is too much. Better to forget that awful birthday party when you were 5.
I am sorry your Grandmother was an incestuous pedophile. May she rest in peace. Don't worry, it's not always hereditary.
It's amazing to watch your mind semi-work. You went from music awards to pedophiles in one sentence. Your meltdown amuses me.
Willie is finished with you. You may go now.
Posted by: Brandon_Iron
Re: Brandon Irons Skank Reliquary - 06/13/08 05:03 PM
Limp Willie: I have nothing but praise for your hardhitting writing. Another stalwart journalist, Tim Russert, passed away today. In what ways would you say he influenced your work at xxxporntalk.com?
(muffled snickering)
Seriously, did you ever watch Meet the Press or were you occupied with that gay subscription channel Press the Meat?
Posted by: LouCypher
Re: Brandon Irons Skank Reliquary - 06/13/08 06:11 PM
Quote:
Brandon Irons is melting down,
Melting down,
Melting down.
Brandon Irons is melting down,
He has herpes.
(sing to the tune of "London Bridge")
Best lol this month... Jesus.
Posted by: Gunker
Re: Brandon Irons Skank Reliquary - 06/13/08 09:16 PM
"I am become death, the destroyer of worlds."
-J. Robert Oppenheimer
Posted by: LouCypher
Re: Brandon Irons Skank Reliquary - 06/13/08 10:03 PM
Quote:
"I am become death, the destroyer of worlds."
-J. Robert Oppenheimer
Nice Gunker...
Heres one for Willie after grinding BI's skull into dust..
"The things you own end up owning you"- Tyler Durden
Like you'd want to be stuck with an Iron.. or worst case scenario, a fucken Knox following you around.
Best to be like the old world slave traders and send the human shit to the bottom with the anchor .. Arrgh Matey.
(slob the deck Kochs)
Posted by: Anonymous
Re: Brandon Irons Skank Reliquary - 06/14/08 12:25 AM
Quote:
"I am become death, the destroyer of worlds."
-J. Robert Oppenheimer
Bhagavad Gita
Posted by: Brandon_Iron
Re: Brandon Irons Skank Reliquary - 06/14/08 12:37 AM
My skull is not ground into dust. In fact, the only thing dusty around here are your tired, lame ass, penis-envy-denying jokes.
Dusty....
Quote:
By extension, Larry Flynt and Hugh Hefner must be bigger chumps, right? I mean, look at all that money those suckas had to pay for women to take their clothes off.
Yeah, but they were attractive women...and it made both of them into multi-millionaires. Also, the last time Hefner rode in a self-promoting corporate logo-liveried vehicle, it was a pimped out private jet called 'The Big Bunny', not a minivan called 'The PXP Mobile'. Just sayin'... 
Posted by: Bornyo
Re: Brandon Irons Skank Reliquary - 06/14/08 09:35 AM
Anyone else notice Brandon's harder edge since he joined JM Productions?
Here's my poem. It's only three lines so Brandon can memorize it:
The girls are skankier
He is crankier
His dick is canker-ier.
Posted by: Brandon_Iron
Re: Brandon Irons Skank Reliquary - 06/14/08 01:00 PM
I approve Bornyo's post for its creativity.
All of you others need to know that the road of a male porn star is a long and hard one. My luck meanders much like one of my veins that transports blood to my blessed cock. I continue to forge ahead in my career just as my bulbous cock head plows through uncertainty and darkness.
I take your knocks like Knox, with aplomb and dignity. I realize that my international superstardom angers many of you just as Larry Flynt's stand angered Joseph Paul Franklin. Like Mr. Flynt, I would prefer to be hated for what I am than loved for what I am not.
I did not ask for this to be my lot in life. Greatness was thrust upon me. You may not have one iota of comprehension of what it is like to be as God-gifted but I sincerely wish you love, health, and happiness as you secretly worship men who have the courage to pursue their destiny.
I do this for you.
You're welcome.
Your Canadian Idol
Posted by: BIFF™
Re: Brandon Irons Skank Reliquary - 06/14/08 01:43 PM
Quote:
... blah, blah, blah, blah.
I would prefer to be hated for what I am than loved for what I am not.
blah, blah, blah, blah, blah.
You're loved for not being disease-free?
Posted by: Brandon_Iron
Re: Brandon Irons Skank Reliquary - 06/14/08 02:54 PM
No, mainly I am loved orally. Fillet of fellatio is the table d'hote.
Posted by: Gunker
Re: Brandon Irons Skank Reliquary - 06/14/08 04:53 PM
Quote:
My luck meanders much like one of my veins that transports blood to my blessed cock.
Unfortunately, this same vein starts in your scalp, thus depriving your hair follicles of much-needed nourishment.
Thus, it is a blessing and a curse, really.
Posted by: Jigaloo
Re: Brandon Irons Skank Reliquary - 06/14/08 04:57 PM
If Brandon wore a toupee we could call him Hairpiece Simplex.
I hope this will be funnier the second time around.
Posted by: Anonymous
Re: Brandon Irons Skank Reliquary - 06/14/08 05:44 PM
Quote:
I take your knocks like Knox, with aplomb and dignity.
Aplomb & Dignity?????
Posted by: Brandon_Iron
Re: Brandon Irons Skank Reliquary - 06/14/08 05:47 PM
Kudos to Khan. That was brilliant, sir. I wish the rest of you could match him.
Posted by: LouCypher
Re: Brandon Irons Skank Reliquary - 06/14/08 08:57 PM
Quote:
Quote:
I take your knocks like Knox, with aplomb and dignity.
Aplomb & Dignity?????
Porns Eyesore aka Ryan Knox "I'm a female cum-dumpster"
Bahaaaa..
Even the very best rehab facility isn't qualified to cover this level of fail. You show this clip to the highest level of Psych-ops and they just shake their heads and scribble in shorthand on their pads.. living abortion.
I love this board..Thanks Ryan.
Posted by: LouCypher
Re: Brandon Irons Skank Reliquary - 06/14/08 09:01 PM
Quote:
Anyone else notice Brandon's harder edge since he joined JM Productions?
Bea Eye is a funny fucker and he's seemed to find his stride, that being about 5 inches in accordance with his Mini Me stature. Walk small and talk tall BI. 
Posted by: Gunker
Re: Brandon Irons Skank Reliquary - 06/15/08 12:30 AM
Word.
BI is invulnerable to all of my critique much like his peen is ever-standing whilst presented with both herp and skanks.
Masada, Alamo, Berlin, Brandon...they've all stayed true to the end...
Posted by: freestylah
Re: Brandon Irons Skank Reliquary - 06/15/08 05:39 AM
Quote:
If Brandon wore a toupee we could call him Hairpiece Simplex.
I hope this will be funnier the second time around.
It's the second line that makes it very funny, Vin.
Posted by: RyanKnox
Re: Brandon Irons Skank Reliquary - 06/15/08 01:23 PM
Quote:
I love this board..Thanks Ryan.
Thank you Lou. For every insult you put out towards me, there's a girl that I get to fuck that you dont. The world is as it should be. Enjoy the flame war throwing board bitch. At least you have XPT.
Posted by: Anonymous
Re: Brandon Irons Skank Reliquary - 06/15/08 01:30 PM
Quote:
there's a girl that I get to fuck...
Now that's comedy.
Posted by: RyanKnox
Re: Brandon Irons Skank Reliquary - 06/15/08 02:40 PM
There is something funny about a 40 year old man who only gets to talk shit about people that actualy get laid. I see the humor in it for sure.
Posted by: Anonymous
Re: Brandon Irons Skank Reliquary - 06/15/08 03:52 PM
Just to be clear: You're the only one who thinks getting laid involves having a chick sodomize you with a strap-on. Well, you and Skurt.
Posted by: LouCypher
Re: Brandon Irons Skank Reliquary - 06/15/08 07:56 PM
Quote:
Quote:
I love this board..Thanks Ryan.
Thank you Lou. For every insult you put out towards me, there's a girl that I get to fuck that you dont. The world is as it should be. Enjoy the flame war throwing board bitch. At least you have XPT.
Correction anti-erection.. You meant to type "girl you get paid to fuck".
Theres a reason Knox rhymes with Crocks.
Ya I tied this in with another thread but fail is fail. Especially on the universal level that the walked on human shit that I've quoted exists on.. Ya dig?.
It's cool Ryan, you're not expected to understand..just hit the pipe and catch a ride to the next shoot that you won't get it up at. 
Posted by: RyanKnox
Re: Brandon Irons Skank Reliquary - 06/15/08 09:39 PM
Quote:
Just to be clear: You're the only one who thinks getting laid involves having a chick sodomize you with a strap-on.
Correction. You're the only one who thinks that.
On a scale of 1 to 10(1 being your blow up doll; and 10 being Lexi Love)what would you rate your right hand?
I'm confident you could count the number of girls you've slept with on your right hand.
I'd let Lexi Love pound my balls flat with a mallet and shove a lit firecracker up my ass for all I care.
:40 year old virgin:
Posted by: RyanKnox
Re: Brandon Irons Skank Reliquary - 06/15/08 09:44 PM
Quote:
You meant to type "girl you get paid to fuck".
You make it sound so much worse than it is
Posted by: Anonymous
Re: Brandon Irons Skank Reliquary - 06/15/08 09:52 PM
Quote:
Correction. You're the only one who thinks that.
On a scale of 1 to 10(1 being your blow up doll; and 10 being Lexi Love)what would you rate your right hand?
I'm confident you could count the number of girls you've slept with on your right hand.
I'd let Lexi Love pound my balls flat with a mallet and shove a lit firecracker up my ass for all I care.
Okay, First: I'm not the one being sodomized on film, Knox is.
Second: Who the fuck is this? Knox doesn't even know how to spell the word "confident" and has never found himself in that condition so much as once in his life.
Posted by: *L*G*
Re: Brandon Irons Skank Reliquary - 06/15/08 11:08 PM
Posted by: Brandon_Iron
Re: Brandon Irons Skank Reliquary - 06/16/08 12:58 AM
Posted by: Anonymous
Re: Brandon Irons Skank Reliquary - 06/16/08 06:07 AM
By "work" you mean "stand in the corner jerking off furiously while staring at my cock, trying to get wood," right?
Posted by: Brandon_Iron
Re: Brandon Irons Skank Reliquary - 06/16/08 09:07 AM
Ryan's been good for me and I bet he'll do fine with Mia Lina, too, when the time comes.
Posted by: have2cit
Re: Brandon Irons Skank Reliquary - 06/16/08 09:18 AM
You're right BI, she will fuck his ass righteously.
Posted by: Anonymous
Re: Brandon Irons Skank Reliquary - 06/16/08 09:22 AM
Alright, Henry Higgins: Who do you have the bet with? Methinks it's Jeff himself.
Try as you might, though, there's no way you're going to transform Ryan Woodlittle into a functioning, hetero mope. Not without a fire hose, a truck full of soap and a three-year stint in rehab.
Posted by: Brandon_Iron
Re: Brandon Irons Skank Reliquary - 06/16/08 10:20 AM
Quote:
You're right BI, she will fuck his ass righteously.
None of that will fit in with the sites I do at www.brandoniron.com
Posted by: have2cit
Re: Brandon Irons Skank Reliquary - 06/16/08 10:48 AM
So you'll just have her fuck him for your own enjoyment. Just like JM hired him to be pissed on for ours.
Posted by: *L*G*
Re: Brandon Irons Skank Reliquary - 06/16/08 11:22 AM
Quote:
Ryan's been good for me
of course he is, R Knox rate is a 6 dollar burger from Carls Jr
Posted by: Brandon_Iron
Re: Brandon Irons Skank Reliquary - 06/16/08 11:24 AM
Without onions, of course. He doesn't like to have bad breath when he is kissing all these women.
Posted by: Jigaloo
Re: Brandon Irons Skank Reliquary - 06/16/08 11:40 AM
But won't his breath get bad again when they shit in his mouth?
Posted by: Brandon_Iron
Re: Brandon Irons Skank Reliquary - 06/16/08 12:17 PM
No, I banned Dookie Howser from my sets.
Pretty soon it will be Mia and Ryan sitting in a tree k-i-s-s-i-n-g.
Posted by: *L*G*
Re: Brandon Irons Skank Reliquary - 06/16/08 01:37 PM
Quote:
Without onions, of course. He doesn't like to have bad breath when he is kissing all these women.
first you have to bring him to a carwash, he stink like a skunk
Posted by: RyanKnox
Re: Brandon Irons Skank Reliquary - 06/16/08 04:02 PM
And jealousy has always been a stinky cologne for you.
I'm still very Confident; You see Dim B? Confident that I enjoy my life far more then you enjoy yours.
That said, you may continue smelling my farts here at XPT and the world will keep turning.
Thank you for the offer Brandon. I'm so there. Maybe Dim B and El Douche will make a lame joke about it. They have years of practice under their belts or in El G's case a shoestring.
Posted by: RyanKnox
Re: Brandon Irons Skank Reliquary - 06/16/08 04:08 PM
Quote:
Okay, First: I'm not the one being sodomized on film
But you are being sodomized in Travel Center bathrooms and the world thanks you for not puting it on film. There are some things that need to remain sacred.
Posted by: Anonymous
Re: Brandon Irons Skank Reliquary - 06/16/08 04:53 PM
Whatever you say... Monsieur.
Posted by: RyanKnox
Re: Brandon Irons Skank Reliquary - 06/16/08 05:06 PM
I just feel fortunate not to be hip to your lame XPT lingo.
Posted by: Anonymous
Re: Brandon Irons Skank Reliquary - 06/16/08 05:17 PM
Quote:
I just feel fortunate not to be hip to your lame XPT lingo.
Uh-HUH... So we're supposed to believe that Cryin' suddenly became coherent? That, overnight, he learned to say something besides "You're old," and "I know you are but what am I?"
Seriously, where is Cryin? Part of me wants to believe you're a nice guy and actually do have him in rehab. The rest of me thinks you've got him picking up your Valtrex and detailing the BIP-mobile. Big mistake on the latter.
Wherever he is, I doubt even you would actually put him on the set, unless he's getting assraped by Craigslist's Worst.
Posted by: RyanKnox
Re: Brandon Irons Skank Reliquary - 06/16/08 05:33 PM
You don't have to quote me, I'm right here.
I do appreciate the hard work youre puting into your posts.
You're hiting me with everything you got and I respect that.
I dont stand a chance against the resident troll so I'll say, "Congradulations." You've won the battle and the war!
Now you can go away.
Posted by: Anonymous
Re: Brandon Irons Skank Reliquary - 06/16/08 05:40 PM
Quote:
You don't have to quote me, I'm right here.
I do appreciate the hard work youre puting into your posts.
You're hiting me with everything you got and I respect that.
You get quoted, monsieur, so you don't try to dumb down the posts retroactively. Or otherwise make them conform to the Knoxian schtick.
Oh, and BTW: Cryin has neither "appreciated" nor "respected" anything in his life. Not even himself. I should think his "friend" would know that much.
Posted by: RyanKnox
Re: Brandon Irons Skank Reliquary - 06/16/08 05:46 PM
Is this what happens when you start melting down? You address posters as other people? Go easy Pops. You're breaking my heart
Posted by: Anonymous
Re: Brandon Irons Skank Reliquary - 06/16/08 06:21 PM
Quote:
Is this what happens when you start melting down? You address posters as other people? Go easy Pops. You're breaking my heart
Only one melting down around here is you, Valtrex boy. Hilarious. Almost as hilarious as how you don't start using Cryin's "you're old" schtick until I bring it up. Usually, it's the first thing out of his mouth.
I give it three more posts before you accuse me of kissing Gia's ass. The two usually go hand in hand.
When are you going to start addressing people as "fan?"
Posted by: RyanKnox
Re: Brandon Irons Skank Reliquary - 06/16/08 06:26 PM
I don't need to remind you of what you already are
Posted by: have2cit
Re: Brandon Irons Skank Reliquary - 06/16/08 06:28 PM
But apparently we need to remind you of what you are, a bitch.
Posted by: BIFF™
Re: Brandon Irons Skank Reliquary - 06/16/08 06:29 PM
Quote:
I don't need to remind you of what you already are
Do the planet a favor and make like your avatar. TIA.
Posted by: RyanKnox
Re: Brandon Irons Skank Reliquary - 06/16/08 06:39 PM
Quote:
But apparently we need to remind you of what you are, a bitch.
If I'm a bitch then you're my Ho Cake. What's it like being mentally inferior to someone who calls you Ho Cake, Ho Cake?
Posted by: have2cit
Re: Brandon Irons Skank Reliquary - 06/16/08 06:42 PM
Ho cake? Put down the pipe son, don't you realize meth is making you stupid?
Posted by: Willie D
Re: Brandon Irons Skank Reliquary - 06/16/08 07:21 PM
It's true, Brandon...or Ryan, whichever one of you is posting as "RyanKnox" now. You're sounding more retarded than usual these days.
Posted by: RyanKnox
Re: Brandon Irons Skank Reliquary - 06/16/08 07:26 PM
It is true that when you die you will be reincarnated as a cheeseburger, that is true.
Posted by: LouCypher
Re: Brandon Irons Skank Reliquary - 06/16/08 08:11 PM
Quote:
Fail on an Epic level.
If there were a stronger or more appropriate word for "shit", that pic would apply.
That being said contemplate this, if Ryan could afford a lawyer, Malice would have to sticky a thread calling off the dogs like Lonny Dong did.
There's a point where truth and honesty meet. For you Knox that point reads "less than lockwood".
Posted by: Willie D
Re: Brandon Irons Skank Reliquary - 06/16/08 10:31 PM
Quote:
It is true that when you die you will be reincarnated as a cheeseburger, that is true.
Reincatnation: rebirth in new bodies or forms of life; especially : a rebirth of a soul in a new human body Link.
You need to get your allegories straight, chump. Did you mean to imply I'd be reborn as a dairy cow, or perhaps a wheat stalk? That would have been a lot more accurate. But in retrospect, you might have a good idea there--I'd be nowhere near you, since all you ingest are meth rocks, pot brownies, and fat hooker urine.
Posted by: RyanKnox
Re: Brandon Irons Skank Reliquary - 06/16/08 10:54 PM
Did you mean:
reincarnation
Link.
Posted by: Brandon_Iron
Re: Brandon Irons Skank Reliquary - 06/17/08 04:05 AM
I would like to turn this heated debate in the following direction: Jayda Diamond. Discuss.
Petite and cute with a generous taint.
Fuckable pink sock-ish pussy with a firm seal.
Enjoys butt love....sort of.
Eats cum.
I love this crazy little nut and I'm proud to have her as the 388th update at
www.loadmymouth.com
Posted by: have2cit
Re: Brandon Irons Skank Reliquary - 06/17/08 05:15 AM
Another great find. Enjoy your staph infection. I hope the sores break out on your face, this time. Although we all realize that would never keep you from shooting.
Posted by: Brandon_Iron
Re: Brandon Irons Skank Reliquary - 06/17/08 05:51 AM
No, sir, the only thing that will stop me is your (giggle) internet t-t-taunts (chuckle) that m-m-make me want to go away and (ppppppphhhhhhh....teeheehee) quit doing what I've spent over a decade enjoying. BAHHHH HAAAAHHHHH HAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!
Keep up the pressure, duderino. I am going to crack from someone with your kind of mind-fuck muscle. Come to think of it, I will barely be able to enjoy today's bj now that I know you are so mean.
I suggest you take up your complaint with my ever-horny penis. It guides me through life.
I don't mean to joke but, seriously, I picture you as that children's book author in Elf.
I may be short myself but you are that dude in my mind, man. Just don't come running at me across a boardroom table. That's all I ask.
Posted by: have2cit
Re: Brandon Irons Skank Reliquary - 06/17/08 06:27 AM
Poor girl, if only she knew what we did. The herpes on your dick, will be forever on her lips. Don't forget to show her your doctored AIM test too.
Posted by: Brandon_Iron
Re: Brandon Irons Skank Reliquary - 06/17/08 06:36 AM
By "doctored" I assume you mean approved by Dr. Sharon Mitchell?
Posted by: have2cit
Re: Brandon Irons Skank Reliquary - 06/17/08 06:38 AM
Yes, she approved Marc Wallice's as well. Dick of Death meet Dick of Disease.
Posted by: Brandon_Iron
Re: Brandon Irons Skank Reliquary - 06/17/08 06:48 AM
It's all about the cock with you, isn't it? I'm sorry you made different choices with your life. I really am. And I STILL can't get the image of you running at me across a boardroom table like in Elf. I can't take it!
When my sex life gets you as angry as you are right now, does your brow get all furrowed and wrinkly?
Posted by: have2cit
Re: Brandon Irons Skank Reliquary - 06/17/08 06:57 AM
Yeah, right. I'm not the one constantly taking pictures of my own penis to display to bunch of guys on a porn board. Go shoot your herpes bullets then, Dick-O-Disease, and hope to hell that the Buddhists are wrong on that whole karma thing.
Posted by: Brandon_Iron
Re: Brandon Irons Skank Reliquary - 06/17/08 07:00 AM
The pics I take have women in them.
The pics in your head have only my cock.
Deal with it.
Posted by: have2cit
Re: Brandon Irons Skank Reliquary - 06/17/08 07:22 AM
We all know if you could find a way to sell it you'd remove the girls as an unneeded expense. I hear there is a gay section at ADT you could use. Are homos generally into midgets?
Face the fact that you enjoy seeing your cock in pictures more than any girl. Not that there's anything wrong with that.
Quote:
By "doctored" I assume you mean approved by Dr. Sharon Mitchell?
Fail.
Posted by: Brandon_Iron
Re: Brandon Irons Skank Reliquary - 06/17/08 02:45 PM
Mia Freak frowns at your lack of creativity. So do I.
Posted by: freestylah
Re: Brandon Irons Skank Reliquary - 06/17/08 03:36 PM
Lack of creativity?? This coming from a man who is releasing not one, but two DVDs with a total of 550+ cumshots? The same man, who updates his website every third day with more of the same?
Come on, Mr. Irons. Pot? Kettle?
Posted by: Brandon_Iron
Re: Brandon Irons Skank Reliquary - 06/17/08 03:42 PM
Let me get this straight. I put out 2 of the best cumshot comps in a long time and you complain. I put up 3 cumswallowers per week at
www.loadmymouth.com and you complain. Freestylah, your name is hereby officially changed to Freebaser. Whatever hard drugs you are on, get help.
Neither Kimberly Franklin nor I can look at you.
Posted by: freestylah
Re: Brandon Irons Skank Reliquary - 06/17/08 03:55 PM
I don't use drugs. I don't need to.
I am not complaining. I'm merely pointing out that I don't think it's fair to talk about someone's lack of creativity, where you are not exactly Mr. Creativity yourself. Your posts are funny and (somewhat) creative; I can't say the same about your product. Sorry if I hurt your feelings. Have a nice day, Mr. Irons; I'm off to bed.
Posted by: have2cit
Re: Brandon Irons Skank Reliquary - 06/17/08 05:07 PM
She's really going to frown when the break outs start.
Posted by: Brandon_Iron
Re: Brandon Irons Skank Reliquary - 06/17/08 05:41 PM
Have2cit, I think you have 2 sit down. Now, please. Good doggie.
I'm serious about the pressure, though. Really. If this keeps up, I am only going to update
www.loadmymouth.com three times per week. I mean it.
Posted by: have2cit
Re: Brandon Irons Skank Reliquary - 06/17/08 06:03 PM
Fuck off you disease ridden little dwarf. Please stick your festering loins in a Cuisinart and then do the world a favor and turn it on.
Posted by: Vizzle
Re: Brandon Irons Skank Reliquary - 06/17/08 06:44 PM
Quote:
Let me get this straight. I put out 2 of the best cumshot comps in a long time and you complain.
He's got ya there Freestylah, his cumshot comps are blowing out the door. The guy's got a stranglehold on the niche.
Posted by: Willie D
Re: Brandon Irons Skank Reliquary - 06/17/08 06:48 PM
Brandon Iron
s still hasn't guessed which pornographer told me Brandon is bascially as mentally proficient as a child, with each avoidance of the topic, he just continues to prove the point.
Who else would think it's cool to drive around in a porno-minivan?
Posted by: RyanKnox
Re: Brandon Irons Skank Reliquary - 06/17/08 07:41 PM
Quote:
his amazing cheapness.
Talk is cheap. You talk. Brandon shoots. Go figure.
Posted by: Brandon_Iron
Re: Brandon Irons Skank Reliquary - 06/17/08 07:57 PM
Quote:
Brandon Irons still hasn't guessed which rnographer told me Brandon is bascially as mentally proficient as a child, with each avoidance of the topic, he just continues to prove the point.
Who else would think it's cool to drive around in a porno-minivan?
Sorry, I was busy putting out have2cit's mental meltdown. He went Chernobyl on us.
Everyone is entitled to their opinions, Limp Willie, and I am choosing to receive a blowjob this evening instead of play guessing games with you. Adios, munchacos. Stay noodley.
Posted by: have2cit
Re: Brandon Irons Skank Reliquary - 06/17/08 08:10 PM
Please, we all know you were busy taking pictures of your own penis. “Oh, I really love how the veins pop out in this lighting.” “My, the flesh tones really come alive with this whores face as a background.”
Posted by: Brandon_Iron
Re: Brandon Irons Skank Reliquary - 06/17/08 08:31 PM
Sir, not only is your epidermis showing. Your gayness is, too. Please stop obsessing over my penis. It is merely a tool I use when I go to work everyday. Kind of like that plunger you use clearing backed-up toilets. Again, I am sorry you did not make different choices in your life. Move on. Way on. And wipe your shoes before you enter someone's house. Your crap-tracks are whack, Jack...I mean have2shit.
Brianna is waiting. Gotta go, boss.
Posted by: have2cit
Re: Brandon Irons Skank Reliquary - 06/17/08 08:40 PM
The only one who obsesses over your penis is yourself, you stupid hockey puck. Once you've admitted this and taken the first step, perhaps you can move on to the other eleven steps towards ending your sex addiction and finally stop infecting as many of the socal girls, with herpes, as you can get a hold of. Good luck.
Posted by: Brandon_Iron
Re: Brandon Irons Skank Reliquary - 06/17/08 08:43 PM
I'll stop immediately once you confirm one girl who caught anything other than a load in her mouth from me. Step up or shut up.
Posted by: have2cit
Re: Brandon Irons Skank Reliquary - 06/17/08 08:56 PM
Oh I see I struck a nerve with the sex addiction talk, this is not the first time you've heard this, is it? Maybe it's time to act on the advice you've obviously been given in the past and end this horrible obsession to infect as many women as you can. By the way was it your mother that made you hate women so much?
Posted by: Brandon_Iron
Re: Brandon Irons Skank Reliquary - 06/18/08 12:25 AM
Quote:
I'll stop immediately once you confirm one girl who caught anything other than a load in her mouth from me. Step up or shut up.
Weird to quote yourself but step up or shut up.
Quote:
Mia Freak frowns at your lack of creativity. So do I.
Oh...I thought you were frowning because it makes your hairline move slightly downwards.
Also, bashing someone for a lack of creativity with a picture of someone who calls themselves 'Mia Freak' is pretty funny...we'll have to change your name to 'Brandon Ironic' if you keep this up! As an aside, how long before some Asian starlet cottons on to Ms. Freak's genius and adopts the nom de plume of 'Mia So Horny'?
Still, none of this changes the issue at hand (the one you unsurprisingly dodged)...Sharon Mitchell is not a doctor.
Posted by: Brandon_Iron
Re: Brandon Irons Skank Reliquary - 06/18/08 01:40 AM
Which AIM test do you want? The one that expires next month, the one from last month, last year, or from October 1997? There are at least 128 available.
Still waiting, have2shit.
Posted by: have2cit
Re: Brandon Irons Skank Reliquary - 06/18/08 04:58 AM
We want the one you show the girls, you know the one with the white out over the herpes portion of the test.
Posted by: Brandon_Iron
Re: Brandon Irons Skank Reliquary - 06/18/08 11:52 AM
Still waiting for one name from one girl........thought so.
Posted by: have2cit
Re: Brandon Irons Skank Reliquary - 06/18/08 12:19 PM
Still waiting for that clean herpes test........thought not.
Posted by: Brandon_Iron
Re: Brandon Irons Skank Reliquary - 06/18/08 12:46 PM
No name, no game. You're lame.
Posted by: have2cit
Re: Brandon Irons Skank Reliquary - 06/18/08 01:02 PM
red sore, red sore, you're a whore
Posted by: Brandon_Iron
Re: Brandon Irons Skank Reliquary - 06/18/08 01:08 PM
There are hundreds of industry women out there -- nearly 400 at
www.loadmymouth.com alone -- and you can't come up with one who will stand up and back up your shit? Even a dead porn star? Anyone at all?
Posted by: have2cit
Re: Brandon Irons Skank Reliquary - 06/18/08 01:09 PM
Hush money works well with whores, are saying you've been taking AIM tests since 1997 and come up with one clean from herpes?
Posted by: RyanKnox
Re: Brandon Irons Skank Reliquary - 06/18/08 01:33 PM
You need to be banned for all of your rubbish posts ya slack-jawed faggot.
Have you ever had the need to get an STD test? Also, what high school do you go to?
Posted by: have2cit
Re: Brandon Irons Skank Reliquary - 06/18/08 01:42 PM
Yeah right mansewer/Ryan, whichever one is posting with that account, that's your only answer? Trying to get me banned. You fail.
Still waiting...........
Posted by: Anonymous
Re: Brandon Irons Skank Reliquary - 06/18/08 01:45 PM
Quote:
You need to be banned for all of your rubbish posts ya slack-jawed faggot.
Knox doesn't know from hyphenation, Monsieur. I think the word "rubbish" is a bit out of his league, as well.
Although the irony of using his ID to call anyone slack-jawed is funny as Hell.
Posted by: Brandon_Iron
Re: Brandon Irons Skank Reliquary - 06/18/08 01:47 PM
Just back yo shit up, son. Maybe if I speak ebonics, you'll understand. English doesn't seem to be working.
You claim that multiple girls are catching STDs from me. I am asking for just one who will back you up. It's simple. If you can't do it, that's cool. I just have to "work" so please put me in my place.
One name.....not initials. Not heresay. Be a man.
Posted by: have2cit
Re: Brandon Irons Skank Reliquary - 06/18/08 01:51 PM
This isn't a court of law, it's a court of public opinion and you have been found guilty on all charges, so: back yo shit up, hockey puck.
Posted by: Bill Hicks
Re: Brandon Irons Skank Reliquary - 06/18/08 02:02 PM
Quote:
You need to be banned for all of your rubbish posts ya slack-jawed faggot.
Have you ever had the need to get an STD test? Also, what high school do you go to?
Can't be Knox. The posting style is wrong. He isn't nearly this articulate.
Posted by: Brandon_Iron
Re: Brandon Irons Skank Reliquary - 06/18/08 02:37 PM
Hockey Puck says, "I shoot, I score."
Wayne Gretzky said it best: "You miss 100% of the shots you don't take." You defy logic by missing 100% of the shots you
do take.
Game over, have2shit. You lose.
Posted by: have2cit
Re: Brandon Irons Skank Reliquary - 06/18/08 02:46 PM
So in other words you can't prove I'm wrong. You fail.
Posted by: Willie D
Re: Brandon Irons Skank Reliquary - 06/18/08 02:47 PM
One name: Hillary Scott
Posted by: Brandon_Iron
Re: Brandon Irons Skank Reliquary - 06/18/08 03:13 PM
Limp Willie: Let have2shit do his own homework. Hillary can speak for herself and if she claims she caught something from me, she knows how to reach me. She hasn't so I'll take her word over yours anyday.
Back to you, have2shit. Could you make it snappy, please. I have a booking at 6pm. Pics will follow.
Posted by: have2cit
Re: Brandon Irons Skank Reliquary - 06/18/08 03:25 PM
The burden of proof lies with you putain, all you have to do is walk in to AIM next time you need your test and say, "I want to include a herpes screening with this test" then you can prove us all wrong, but you won't because you have herpes. You fail.
Posted by: Brandon_Iron
Re: Brandon Irons Skank Reliquary - 06/18/08 04:10 PM
That's it! I can't take it anymore! From this day forward, due to the unrelenting and overwhelming pressure from you, I will only update
www.loadmymouth.com three times per week. No more, no less. You have got the better of me, sir, and I salute you. Congratulations! I have not met an internet adversary as savy as yourself in a long, long time.
You can finally take that crap you've been holding in, have2shit. It's been leaking out of your mouth for quite some time now.
P.S. I just noticed you still haven't come up with a single performer who says I gave them anything but a check.
P.S.S. I do have a stat for you to chew on. The #1 title from JM Productions at mallcom.com is.........POP TARTS. Hooray!
Top Selling Jm Productions Titles
1. Pop Tarts
2. Butt Licking Anal Whores 9
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Posted by: have2cit
Re: Brandon Irons Skank Reliquary - 06/18/08 04:47 PM
Quote:
Brandon Irons is melting down,
Melting down,
Melting down.
Brandon Irons is melting down,
He has herpes.
(sing to the tune of "London Bridge")
one test......we're waiting putain.
Posted by: Brandon_Iron
Re: Brandon Irons Skank Reliquary - 06/18/08 04:51 PM
One name.
(I'll even throw in the $35 I made today from the affiliate program at
www.brandoniron.com)
Posted by: have2cit
Re: Brandon Irons Skank Reliquary - 06/18/08 05:08 PM
Hillary Scott. Now where's your test? We're waiting putain.......
Posted by: Brandon_Iron
Re: Brandon Irons Skank Reliquary - 06/18/08 05:17 PM
Sir, I know Hillary Scott. I dated Hillary Scott. I have great respect for Hillary Scott.
When and where did she say she got something from me? We can bullshit for pages and pages or we can just cut to the chase.
I can name the time and place I fell in love with her. We even took photos the day we met.
The least you can do is follow through and prove your point. The $35 offer is still good but only if you man up. It's the least you can do for making me feel as guilty as I do putting a photo of the great Scott in a thread whose title I cannot speak. She deserves better, and so do I.
Posted by: have2cit
Re: Brandon Irons Skank Reliquary - 06/18/08 05:39 PM
The burden of proof still lies with you. Prove me wrong. You can't so you fail. You're like Katja Kassin or Taryn Thomas telling bold face lies about their sideline hooking when the common knowledge says very different.
What it all comes down to is one simple question. Do you, Brandon Irons, have herpes? If you answer, no, then prove it. Otherwise shut your herpes infected mouth.
Posted by: Brandon_Iron
Re: Brandon Irons Skank Reliquary - 06/18/08 06:00 PM
I guess $35 was not enough....
Posted by: Willie D
Re: Brandon Irons Skank Reliquary - 06/18/08 06:08 PM
Quote:
I have great respect for Hillary Scott.
That's funny, because she spent a good deal of time here trashing you. I guess the feeling isn't mutual.
And why were you fucking Hailey Young behind Hillary's back? Hill was pretty nice for a professional anal whore; Hailey Young was a stick figured Xanax addict. Remember the incident at the Circle Bar?
Posted by: Brandon_Iron
Re: Brandon Irons Skank Reliquary - 06/18/08 06:12 PM
Hell hath no fury like a woman scorned. I have nothing bad to say about Hillary. She's the best.
Posted by: have2cit
Re: Brandon Irons Skank Reliquary - 06/18/08 06:21 PM
A simple answer with proof is more than enough for me, but impossible for you, because you can't pass the AIM test.
Posted by: Brandon_Iron
Re: Brandon Irons Skank Reliquary - 06/18/08 06:25 PM
And you, sir, can't find one human being who will say I gave them an STD. It's called a stalemate. You keep making the same accusation but where are the victims? That's stale, mate.
Posted by: have2cit
Re: Brandon Irons Skank Reliquary - 06/18/08 06:31 PM
The victims are silent and paid off. How much did Hillary cost you? There is no stalemate, there is only you with herpes, and me laughing at you with herpes.
Posted by: Brandon_Iron
Re: Brandon Irons Skank Reliquary - 06/18/08 06:49 PM
Perhaps you should take a lesson from the "victims" and be silent. If not for their peace of mind, then for ours.
We have an agreement now, don't we? You'll keep laughing and I'll keep shooting. Done! Whew! I thought I was going to have to give up my $35.
Posted by: have2cit
Re: Brandon Irons Skank Reliquary - 06/18/08 06:51 PM
and I'll keep saying you have herpes, because you can't stop me. get over it.
Posted by: Brandon_Iron
Re: Brandon Irons Skank Reliquary - 06/18/08 06:57 PM
I'll get concerned as soon as you knock me out of top place, my friend.
Top Selling Jm Productions Titles
1. Pop Tarts
2. Butt Licking Anal Whores 9
3. The Animal
4. Fuck Machines
5. She Is Half My Age 2
6. Bound
7. 287 Pop Shots
8. Fucked Up Handjobs
9. Cuckold 3
10. Butt Licking Anal Whores 8
11. Oh No! There's A Negro In My Mom
12. She is Half My Age 3
13. Freaks Of Cock 3
14. Over Stuffed 5
15. Freaks Of Cock
16. Fucked Up Facials 2
17. Cuckold 4
18. She Is Half My Age
19. Hellfire Sex 12
20. Freaks Of Cock 2
If you can do a better job than me, put me out of work. Until that time, I am going to keep doing my best to provide quality entertainment.
Posted by: have2cit
Re: Brandon Irons Skank Reliquary - 06/18/08 07:03 PM
Entertainment? Stick to the classics, put on a silly hat, and then sing the Lollipop Guild song.
Posted by: Brandon_Iron
Re: Brandon Irons Skank Reliquary - 06/18/08 07:08 PM
And on that note, sport, I am going to eat dinner and watch Jeopardy. It's been fun but we've wound up where we started. Have a good one. The shoot tonight is at 9pm. Pics by midnight. Adios.
Posted by: have2cit
Re: Brandon Irons Skank Reliquary - 06/18/08 07:35 PM
Have fun at your infection ooops, shoot, don't forget the 100 or so pictures of your own penis. You know we just can't wait for more.
Posted by: Brandon_Iron
Re: Brandon Irons Skank Reliquary - 06/18/08 07:46 PM
You've already shown how much you care, my friend. No one....no one bitches as well as you, king. A man has never bellyached as much as you over another man getting some head. Whatever works for you is fine by me.
Posted by: have2cit
Re: Brandon Irons Skank Reliquary - 06/18/08 07:54 PM
No man short of smartt enjoys posting pictures of his own penis, to a board full of men, more than you. Congratulations, you're gayer than a Brazilian tranny lover.
Posted by: Brandon_Iron
Re: Brandon Irons Skank Reliquary - 06/18/08 07:58 PM
Uh...you are the only one posting pics of naked men (mine have women in them). It's creepy that they are me but again, whatever works for you. Live and let live. I don't think Gia Jordan or Ceara Lynch know this board is for men only. Can you inform them, please?
You go back and forth between STDs and homosexuality. It makes me believe you are confused. That's ok. Many young gay men are, too.
Posted by: have2cit
Re: Brandon Irons Skank Reliquary - 06/18/08 08:09 PM
Actually they're pictures of you doing gay porn. They seem to have collected here over the years, you're just so loved mansewer. What happened to the infection, oops, shoot? Did she read this thread, wise up, and bolt? Who could blame her.
Posted by: Brandon_Iron
Re: Brandon Irons Skank Reliquary - 06/18/08 08:12 PM
If you call the solo shoot from 1998 "gay porn" I am not going to argue with you. Have fun. You are still the one treasuring the pics and savouring them for what I expect are unsavoury purposes. I only hope you knowledge of STDs is better informed.
If you must know, the shoot is at 9. Pics by midnight. Enjoy.
Posted by: have2cit
Re: Brandon Irons Skank Reliquary - 06/18/08 08:17 PM
Why don't you just trade your pictures with smartt directly and spare us, because I know you won't spare that poor girl tonight from your infected, faggoty seed.
Posted by: Brandon_Iron
Re: Brandon Irons Skank Reliquary - 06/18/08 08:38 PM
Some people enjoy the photos of the women so I will share them with them. The girl has worked for me several times and is happy to return. The only one with a problem with 2 consenting adults doing what they want to do is....you.
Posted by: have2cit
Re: Brandon Irons Skank Reliquary - 06/18/08 08:43 PM
And some people like you and smartt enjoy pictures of their own peni, but what they really love is having other look at it too. So are you're saying is that this girl already has herpes?
Posted by: Brandon_Iron
Re: Brandon Irons Skank Reliquary - 06/18/08 08:53 PM
I'm saying you're boring and a waste of time, man. I barely got to enjoy Globe Trekker on Germany. Oh well, time to go to work. Nice talking to you, overly-concerned-but-not-really nutjob. You are a handful but now it's time to give a young woman a mouthful.
Posted by: have2cit
Re: Brandon Irons Skank Reliquary - 06/18/08 09:01 PM
A whole 7 minutes to prep? You're such a well organized guy.
Tell me do you schedule it at night so you can call it a date, at least to yourself?
Posted by: Anonymous
Re: Brandon Irons Skank Reliquary - 06/19/08 12:17 AM
Quote:
There is no such thing as a bad blowjob.
I saw this Fox series once entitled....."When Blow Jobs go wrong". Trust me its not for the faint of heart....and viewer discretion is advised.
Posted by: *L*G*
Re: Brandon Irons Skank Reliquary - 06/19/08 12:26 AM
Did you guys don't get tired of flame wars with Brandon Irons? dude, is obvious this dude is canadian, fucking flame wars with him are so fucking boring. ZzZzZzZzZz
Posted by: BIFF™
Re: Brandon Irons Skank Reliquary - 06/19/08 01:29 AM
Quote:
...is obvious this dude is canadian, fucking flame wars with him are so fucking boring. ZzZzZzZzZz
So is your life in your shit shack.
Posted by: Brandon_Iron
Re: Brandon Irons Skank Reliquary - 06/19/08 01:55 AM
Neither sleet nor snow nor gloom of night will keep me from my appointed blowjobs.
Posted by: Vizzle
Re: Brandon Irons Skank Reliquary - 06/19/08 05:17 AM
This shit is so fucking boring, it's like watching a never-ending slap fight. Isn't the burden of proof on the prosecution anyway?
Posted by: have2cit
Re: Brandon Irons Skank Reliquary - 06/19/08 05:27 AM
Quote:
Neither sleet nor snow nor gloom of night will keep me from my appointed blowjobs.
Neither chlamydia nor staph of ass will keep you from your appointed infections.
FIXED
and viz, no. he has already been found guilty, he needs only to take the AIM test for exoneration, but we both know why he won't.
This thread is the internet flame war version of a World Cup game between Luxembourg and Liechtenstein.
Posted by: have2cit
Re: Brandon Irons Skank Reliquary - 06/19/08 07:18 AM
Alright, I give up then. Brandon, congratulations. I've been out lamed by the best it seems.
Posted by: *L*G*
Re: Brandon Irons Skank Reliquary - 06/19/08 10:38 AM
Quote:
Quote:
...is obvious this dude is canadian, fucking flame wars with him are so fucking boring. ZzZzZzZzZz
So is your life in your shit shack.
yes biff, yes...ZzZzZzZz
Posted by: Brandon_Iron
Re: Brandon Irons Skank Reliquary - 06/19/08 12:32 PM
Quote:
Alright, I give up then. Brandon, congratulations. I've been out lamed by the best it seems.
Psychologists say it takes 6 weeks for a person to establish a habit. Sir, I have been a manwhore for over a decade now. You simply cannot stop me. It's in my DNA. I am more driven now than ever. Good luck to you but there is no fucking way anyone is going to stop me from doing my stuff. No one. No way.
Posted by: Bill Hicks
Re: Brandon Irons Skank Reliquary - 06/19/08 01:53 PM
Quote:
This thread is the internet flame war version of a World Cup game between Luxembourg and Liechtenstein.
Nicely done, sir.
Posted by: Gunker
Re: Brandon Irons Skank Reliquary - 06/20/08 09:56 PM
Quote:
Some people enjoy the photos of the women so I will share them with them.
The initial intent of this thread; however, it has mutated into something else, akin to whatever variant resides within Brandon...
Posted by: Bravo
Re: Brandon Irons Skank Reliquary - 06/28/08 09:31 PM
Where does Brandon find these mutants?
Quote:
Where does Brandon find these mutants?
Maybe he hit it off with Dr. Charles Xavier at an MPB support group meeting?
Quote:
Quote:
Where does Brandon find these mutants?
Maybe he hit it off with Dr. Charles Xavier at an MPB support group meeting?
Xavier's got better taste. Jean Grey + Storm=scoreboard.
Posted by: Anonymous
Re: Brandon Irons Skank Reliquary - 03/12/15 11:37 PM
Yeah, it's time to bump this ol' thread once again. 'Cause it's FRIDAY:
Alright, I give up then. Brandon, congratulations. I've been out lamed by the best it seems.
Psychologists say it takes 6 weeks for a person to establish a habit. Sir, I have been a manwhore for over a decade now. You simply cannot stop me. It's in my DNA. I am more driven now than ever. Good luck to you but there is no fucking way anyone is going to stop me from doing my stuff. No one. No way.
Someone could push you off a bridge. Hitting the water at 200 mph stops one from doing their stuff. Why didn't you buy me my own last meal, it would've helped.
