"Porno Dan is an Annoying Fucking Tool"

Posted by: Anonymous

"Porno Dan is an Annoying Fucking Tool" - 10/07/08 11:20 AM

http://adultfyi.com/read.php?ID=30563
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Jack wrote this commentary in response to the Bukkake omelet press release put out by Porno Dan- you know, the shoot that was robbed of $3750.

Jack writes on www.ihatewhores.com : I cannot take another fucking second of this Porno Dan retard. Is there nothing you won’t do for attention?

I’ve been meaning to write about how much I fucking loathe you since your birthday party and Sexopolis attention whoring threads on XXXPornTalk. That’s not to say I started hating you then. My hate goes back much further than that. Christ, you are an annoying fucking tool. Please take your ridiculous act elsewhere. It’s been great laughing at you over the years but I think it’s time to move on to someone new. Now you are no longer someone to ridicule for fun, now you’re just making people mad.

I have to address your involvement in hetero porn as it seems like an odd fit for someone as fruity as you. Watching you fuck broads is as out of place as Stephen Hawking auditioning for Dancing With The Stars.

What I’m trying to say is … you look like a pickle smoocher. Totally. I mean seriously. Everyone thinks it. Has anyone actually mentioned it to you? Dude, I have fabric softener that is rougher around the edges than you are. Now this cooking the omelette thing. WTF? Nothing slightly gay about standing over a hot stove with a pan full of jizz cooking in front of you? I assume you’ll be wearing an apron to hide your erection. I can totally see you tasting it for seasoning and people gagging while you respond “What’s the big deal? It’s just cum!” I’m seriously disgusted by you.

In addition to what I mention previously, I also hate everything else about you. Specifically, your phony life of the party persona. Your “I love women” schtick. Dan, you love women so much because you practically are one! BTW, you are not an overgrown frat boy. I’m sure the closest you’ve come to being a frat boy was jacking off thinking about frat boys.

Also, your hair is stupid.

Lastly, So is your dumb domain “TheLittlePenisThatCould” it really should be TheLittlePenisThatNeedsAttention”. Get some help, fuckface.
Posted by: cqd

Re: "Porno Dan is an Annoying Fucking Tool" - 10/07/08 11:33 AM

Quote:


Also, your hair is stupid.




I was thinking the exact same thing.
Posted by: Willie D

Re: "Porno Dan is an Annoying Fucking Tool" - 10/07/08 11:34 AM

Jack forgot to mention that Porno Dan had to cook up the bukkake omlette because all of the whores/females in the building refused to do it.
Posted by: Da Burglar

Re: "Porno Dan is an Annoying Fucking Tool" - 10/09/08 04:23 AM

You ever notice how sometimes, you read something on here and it just goes right by you because you are SOOOO numb and jaded and you just let things roll off you like rainwater?

It just now hit me....CUM OMELETTE. Holy Motherfucking What-Th-eFucks.

Seriously, WHAT THE FUCK?

I am GLAD....repeat, GLAD someone fucking robbed the "payroll" for this stupid fucking event....gahhh, I cant believe i CALLED IT AN EVENT. You fucking deserved it....

This is what PORN has devolved to. Cooking splooge. You dumb fucking retards.

ALL of you...anyone involved in this in anyway. RETARD. Social, Intellectual, Sexual, Culinary......RETARD.
Posted by: DE-Evolution

Re: "Porno Dan is an Annoying Fucking Tool" - 10/10/08 04:36 AM

Wasn't the splooge cooking already done by Ashley Blue anyway? I really hate it when producers are so unoriginal they recreate ridiculous concepts like "milk enemas." Maybe there is a frat party somewhere where dudes are actually laughing at sperm cooking, cuz I can't fathom jerking off to a pan full of cooked cum.

Porno Dan just has SF Valley complex. It'd be nice to punch him in the throat cuz he looks like howard the duck. He is one of those people whose personality instantly repels anyone who can spot a shaky rat. Ron Jeremy has more charm than this saltine cracker.
Posted by: Sho'nuff

Re: "Porno Dan is an Annoying Fucking Tool" - 10/12/08 05:37 PM

Quote:

You ever notice how sometimes, you read something on here and it just goes right by you because you are SOOOO numb and jaded and you just let things roll off you like rainwater?

It just now hit me....CUM OMELETTE. Holy Motherfucking What-Th-eFucks.

Seriously, WHAT THE FUCK?

I am GLAD....repeat, GLAD someone fucking robbed the "payroll" for this stupid fucking event....gahhh, I cant believe i CALLED IT AN EVENT. You fucking deserved it....

This is what PORN has devolved to. Cooking splooge. You dumb fucking retards.

ALL of you...anyone involved in this in anyway. RETARD. Social, Intellectual, Sexual, Culinary......RETARD.




Thank you Burg.

I honestly was beginning to think I was the fucked up one here for *not* being completely deranged.
Posted by: ChodeMasterJ

Re: "Porno Dan is an Annoying Fucking Tool" - 11/02/08 12:03 AM

i can't imagine how bad cooked splooge smells.
Posted by: Ivor Biggun

Re: "Porno Dan is an Annoying Fucking Tool" - 11/02/08 11:36 PM

Posted by: Bluecipher

Re: "Porno Dan is an Annoying Fucking Tool" - 11/03/08 09:35 AM