Girlvert: A Porno Memoir [Paperback]

Posted by: zenman

Girlvert: A Porno Memoir [Paperback] - 03/15/11 10:32 AM

amazon
Posted by: Barry the Pirate

Re: Girlvert: A Porno Memoir [Paperback] - 03/15/11 10:39 AM

I think her real name is a better porn monicker.
Posted by: Spunko

Re: Girlvert: A Porno Memoir [Paperback] - 03/15/11 01:40 PM

$12 ain't bad for a chance to see inside that bitches head.

Pre-ordered and waiting.





Thanx for the tip,Zenman.
Posted by: have2cit

Re: Girlvert: A Porno Memoir [Paperback] - 03/15/11 01:51 PM

April first, how apropo.
Posted by: wannacorndog

Re: Girlvert: A Porno Memoir [Paperback] - 03/15/11 01:54 PM

Always liked Ashley Blue, should be a really good read.
Posted by: Barry the Pirate

Re: Girlvert: A Porno Memoir [Paperback] - 03/15/11 03:25 PM

I was a fan too. Before we all start thinking we'll get close to inside her head, we should remember Rule 1. That said, I'll get it too.
Posted by: Cleetus VanDamme

Re: Girlvert: A Porno Memoir [Paperback] - 03/15/11 04:14 PM

I would like to know what it was like growing up eskimo and perhaps she will give us some of her opinions on the saracen. I will be getting this as well.
Posted by: Spunko

Re: Girlvert: A Porno Memoir [Paperback] - 03/15/11 05:18 PM

Quote:

I was a fan too. Before we all start thinking we'll get close to inside her head, we should remember Rule 1. That said, I'll get it too.






The whore may lie,but I bet it will be interesting bullshit.
Posted by: Barry the Pirate

Re: Girlvert: A Porno Memoir [Paperback] - 03/15/11 05:51 PM

Quote:

Quote:

I was a fan too. Before we all start thinking we'll get close to inside her head, we should remember Rule 1. That said, I'll get it too.






The whore may lie,but I bet it will be interesting bullshit.




I do too. Any whore can lie, it's in their DNA, But for a whore to lie in an entertaining and interesting way, well, that's a good whore.

I never pre- order anything, but I did this. I'm just a fanboi.
Posted by: Willie D

Re: Girlvert: A Porno Memoir [Paperback] - 03/15/11 06:13 PM

I'll buy a copy if there is a lengthy chapter about getting Cryin' Knox to do the Reverse Bukkake.

Is she going to pay any royalties to Cassandra for using that picture on the cover?
Posted by: frankie fatale

Re: Girlvert: A Porno Memoir [Paperback] - 03/15/11 07:13 PM

shes an eskimo?
Posted by: backdoorman

Re: Girlvert: A Porno Memoir [Paperback] - 03/16/11 07:12 AM

I'm waiting for you guys to post a Perverts Digest review.
Posted by: Jeff Steward

Re: Girlvert: A Porno Memoir [Paperback] - 03/18/11 12:23 PM

Im a little worried about how she going paint me in the book. Good guy, bad guy, anti hero? Guess I will have to wait and see.
Posted by: Bornyo

Re: Girlvert: A Porno Memoir [Paperback] - 03/18/11 03:21 PM

Dude. You are a pornographer. Why in the hell would you be worried about your reputation? Your reputation is already that you pay your bills, and for a pornographer that's about as good as it gets.
Posted by: LouCypher

Re: Girlvert: A Porno Memoir [Paperback] - 03/18/11 03:33 PM

i dont think he's worried. its more like "how many shades of satan does she see in red at this point in time?."
Posted by: Max Rhino

Re: Girlvert: A Porno Memoir [Paperback] - 03/18/11 03:42 PM

What if she doesn't even bother to mention you? Would your ego be smashed like a kitten in a crush video?
Posted by: Ron Mexico

Re: Girlvert: A Porno Memoir [Paperback] - 03/18/11 07:20 PM

I just saw the scene she did in Kelly the Coed with Padover...I had to go and vomit from butterface overdose.
Posted by: Jeff Steward

Re: Girlvert: A Porno Memoir [Paperback] - 03/18/11 10:56 PM

Quote:

Dude. You are a pornographer. Why in the hell would you be worried about your reputation? Your reputation is already that you pay your bills, and for a pornographer that's about as good as it gets.




Good point. I guess being king of the gutter is better than not being king at all.
Posted by: Jeff Steward

Re: Girlvert: A Porno Memoir [Paperback] - 03/18/11 11:02 PM

Quote:

What if she doesn't even bother to mention you? Would your ego be smashed like a kitten in a crush video?






I should ban you because your a idiot. The name of the book is Girlvert. I wonder how owns that name moron. Do you hear that? ADT is calling.
Posted by: tattypatty

Re: Girlvert: A Porno Memoir [Paperback] - 03/19/11 12:22 AM

i couldn't beat off to her if my life depended on it, but her and her husband seem solid. I will definitely buy this....
Posted by: Anonymous

Re: Girlvert: A Porno Memoir [Paperback] - 03/19/11 07:36 AM

Quote:

Quote:

Dude. You are a pornographer. Why in the hell would you be worried about your reputation? Your reputation is already that you pay your bills, and for a pornographer that's about as good as it gets.





Good point. I guess being king of the gutter is better than not being king at all.






For all the Ivys and wannabe Ivys here: Leave it to Jeff to create an amalgam of Milton and Oscar Wilde.
Posted by: windsock

Re: Girlvert: A Porno Memoir [Paperback] - 03/19/11 11:50 PM

256 pages is fairly epic for a book of this nature because given the relatively tactful & tasteful cover-art, and because of this young woman's distinctive & intriguing screen presence, I doubt it is padded out with copious lurid photography. May very well be a book of note. Possibly a work of frontline gonzo-gonzo journalism.

Posted by: Dave Naz

Re: Girlvert: A Porno Memoir [Paperback] - 04/12/11 01:39 PM

Video of Oriana Plucking her Pubes for the Collectors Edition of Girlvert: A Porno Memoir.
Posted by: tattypatty

Re: Girlvert: A Porno Memoir [Paperback] - 04/12/11 02:29 PM

i did not need to see that. Lol@ James Frey doing the blurb.
Hopefully my bookstore can order this book. Gonna check today.
Posted by: frankie fatale

Re: Girlvert: A Porno Memoir [Paperback] - 04/12/11 02:36 PM

dave try to pic an avatar just a little bit less gay.thanks.
Posted by: Dave Naz

Re: Girlvert: A Porno Memoir [Paperback] - 04/12/11 02:39 PM

Quote:

dave try to pic an avatar just a little bit less gay.thanks.



But he has such a nice cock.
Posted by: frankie fatale

Re: Girlvert: A Porno Memoir [Paperback] - 04/12/11 02:39 PM

Posted by: LouCypher

Re: Girlvert: A Porno Memoir [Paperback] - 04/12/11 03:18 PM

Quote:

Video of Oriana Plucking her Pubes for the Collectors Edition of Girlvert: A Porno Memoir.




awesome. $200 a pop is it?. i hope you make bank dave and ori.. i really do.

one question though. is the cat featured at all?. the white one. i was going to pay gj hundreds to swipe that fucker.

Posted by: Barry the Pirate

Re: Girlvert: A Porno Memoir [Paperback] - 04/12/11 03:23 PM

$200? For a pube? You're sure yo8u're not Scott Tennerman?

What the fuck is a bulbous pube?
Posted by: LouCypher

Re: Girlvert: A Porno Memoir [Paperback] - 04/12/11 03:31 PM

fuck you for making me google southpark nonsense.

and yeah, pay what you like for whatever but i was referring to the art edition ON SALE NOW.
Posted by: Dave Naz

Re: Girlvert: A Porno Memoir [Paperback] - 04/12/11 03:47 PM

Quote:


awesome. $200 a pop is it?. i hope you make bank dave and ori.. i really do.

one question though. is the cat featured at all?. the white one. i was going to pay gj hundreds to swipe that fucker.





Thank you, I do too. The cat & dog are both featured in the book.
Posted by: LouCypher

Re: Girlvert: A Porno Memoir [Paperback] - 04/12/11 03:57 PM

i like your work naz.. i really do. who else likes daves work. yes?.

i've seen you and i'll admit that you scare me. in the fashion that i imagine you have a taste for bile and can pinpoint certain ethnicitys aromas and bouquet like some people pick bottles of wine. respect.
Posted by: Dave Naz

Re: Girlvert: A Porno Memoir [Paperback] - 04/12/11 04:15 PM

Quote:

i like your work naz.. i really do. who else likes daves work. yes?.

i've seen you and i'll admit that you scare me. in the fashion that i imagine you have a taste for bile and can pinpoint certain ethnicitys aromas and bouquet like some people pick bottles of wine. respect.



Thanks. I love the smell of ethnic people (especially my wife).
Posted by: faceblaster

Re: Girlvert: A Porno Memoir [Paperback] - 04/12/11 04:54 PM

Do the Redd Kross boys still jam in your mom's garage? Is Dalke living in your yard as a homeless guy a la Down and Out in Beverly Hills?
Posted by: Jerkules

Re: Girlvert: A Porno Memoir [Paperback] - 04/12/11 05:04 PM

Any chance there will be an extra special $300 edition, and you'll have a clip of her on all fours w/ some one plucking asshole hairs?
Posted by: Dave Naz

Re: Girlvert: A Porno Memoir [Paperback] - 04/12/11 05:13 PM

Quote:

Any chance there will be an extra special $300 edition, and you'll have a clip of her on all fours w/ some one plucking asshole hairs?



If you buy the $200.00 edition, I'll see to it you get a Brazilian wax strip of asshole hairs.
Posted by: Dave Naz

Re: Girlvert: A Porno Memoir [Paperback] - 04/12/11 05:17 PM

Quote:

Do the Redd Kross boys still jam in your mom's garage? Is Dalke living in your yard as a homeless guy a la Down and Out in Beverly Hills?



That was back in the 80's. I'm finishing up an another album w/ Robert Hecker's other band: It's OK.
Dalke is doing good. I heard from him on Facebook. Pretty sure the last tours he did were Nirvana and Frank Black.
Posted by: Barry the Pirate

Re: Girlvert: A Porno Memoir [Paperback] - 04/12/11 07:12 PM

Quote:

fuck you for making me google southpark nonsense.

and yeah, pay what you like for whatever but i was referring to the art edition ON SALE NOW.




Somehow I was thinking of you Googling that when I threw it in.

I guess I just think the Art Edition should be by an artist. No disrespect to Ashley (she'll always be Ashley to me), but throwing a pube in does not art make. I'm finding it funny that the Sasha retirement is being met with ridicule of her basking in her own idiocy, yet Ashley Blue comes up with a not only a book, but an Art Edition 1st Edition that costs $200. And folks are just kinda discussing it. Pretty civil stuff. I'm not sure what this means, but obviously these two whores are seen differently by the pervert population.

I don't know who Dave Naz is, but I like the cut of his jib, as it were. Welcome!
Posted by: tattypatty

Re: Girlvert: A Porno Memoir [Paperback] - 04/12/11 07:17 PM

Quote:


i like your work naz.. i really do. who else likes daves work. yes?.



I gotta admit I wanted to hate on him, but his science it too tight (cock avatars aside). Plus he and i both think Bill Margold is a faggot.
Posted by: Barry the Pirate

Re: Girlvert: A Porno Memoir [Paperback] - 04/12/11 07:23 PM

Quote:

Quote:


i like your work naz.. i really do. who else likes daves work. yes?.



I gotta admit I wanted to hate on him, but his science it too tight (cock avatars aside). Plus he and i both think Bill Margold is a faggot.




The cock avatar is funny as fuck. Early 70's Swedish porn, by the looks of it.

But...doesn't everyone think Margold's a fag?
Posted by: Uomo Grassissimo!!

Re: Girlvert: A Porno Memoir [Paperback] - 04/12/11 08:22 PM

Quote:

Thanks. I love the smell of ethnic people (especially my wife).




Well a woman who'll kiss on the very first date is usually a hussy.

And a woman who'll kiss on the second time out is anything but fussy.

But a woman who waits 'til the third time around, head in the clouds, feet on the ground!

She's the girl he's glad he's found: She's his Shipoopi!

Posted by: damaged

Re: Girlvert: A Porno Memoir [Paperback] - 04/12/11 10:19 PM

I think the difference in response to Ashley's book vs. Sasha's retirement is that while Sasha always took herself far too seriously, Ashley never did. Basically, Sasha is a deluded, pretentious, pseudo-intellectual snob and Ashely is a self-aware whore. Sasha talked about exploring sexuality and existentialism and Ashley talked about dealing with cock cheese. Both were fine whores but I think I'd rather have a beer with and a sloppy blow job from Ashley.
Posted by: Dave Naz

Re: Girlvert: A Porno Memoir [Paperback] - 04/12/11 10:54 PM

Quote:


I guess I just think the Art Edition should be by an artist. No disrespect to Ashley (she'll always be Ashley to me), but throwing a pube in does not art make. I'm finding it funny that the Sasha retirement is being met with ridicule of her basking in her own idiocy, yet Ashley Blue comes up with a not only a book, but an Art Edition 1st Edition that costs $200. And folks are just kinda discussing it. Pretty civil stuff. I'm not sure what this means, but obviously these two whores are seen differently by the pervert population.




Art is subjective and people will always argue over it. Some people just don't get it and that's fine too. Ori's artwork is shown in galleries and it does sell.

Bill Margold is an idiot.
Posted by: Barry the Pirate

Re: Girlvert: A Porno Memoir [Paperback] - 04/13/11 09:57 AM

Quote:

Quote:


I guess I just think the Art Edition should be by an artist. No disrespect to Ashley (she'll always be Ashley to me), but throwing a pube in does not art make. I'm finding it funny that the Sasha retirement is being met with ridicule of her basking in her own idiocy, yet Ashley Blue comes up with a not only a book, but an Art Edition 1st Edition that costs $200. And folks are just kinda discussing it. Pretty civil stuff. I'm not sure what this means, but obviously these two whores are seen differently by the pervert population.




Art is subjective and people will always argue over it. Some people just don't get it and that's fine too. Ori's artwork is shown in galleries and it does sell.

Bill Margold is an idiot.




You're right on both counts. Some of the shops I sell my wares at call me an artist, but I've never thought of myself as one. It's all the eyes of the beholder.
Posted by: Barry the Pirate

Re: Girlvert: A Porno Memoir [Paperback] - 04/13/11 10:03 AM

Quote:

I think the difference in response to Ashley's book vs. Sasha's retirement is that while Sasha always took herself far too seriously, Ashley never did. Basically, Sasha is a deluded, pretentious, pseudo-intellectual snob and Ashely is a self-aware whore. Sasha talked about exploring sexuality and existentialism and Ashley talked about dealing with cock cheese. Both were fine whores but I think I'd rather have a beer with and a sloppy blow job from Ashley.




I think that's it in a nutshell. A whore who thinks of themselves as better than a whore, versus a whore who knows she's a whore and is pretty OK with that.
Posted by: Uomo Grassissimo!!

Re: Girlvert: A Porno Memoir [Paperback] - 04/13/11 02:16 PM

Quote:

A whore who thinks of themselves as better than a whore, versus a whore who knows she's a whore and is pretty OK with that.




It's not like Ashley could have been anything more ...


Sasha, who doesn't appeal to me, has some resonance with mainstream-arty people who don't know anything much about porn, want a valid socially-acceptable reason to watch some, so they are looking to find an iota evidence of it being "art".

Plus, there is always a "surprise" when a whore shows any interest in anything other than drugs, lap dogs, fashion bags and/or jewelry.

On both, for me, Sasha isn't as hard on the eyes as Ashley.

Posted by: gia jordan

Re: Girlvert: A Porno Memoir [Paperback] - 04/13/11 04:16 PM

Glad to see Dave Naz on the board. Yay!
Posted by: backdoorman

Re: Girlvert: A Porno Memoir [Paperback] - 04/13/11 04:18 PM

Needs to bring 2 or 3 tough whores with him from now on though!
Posted by: Uomo Grassissimo!!

Re: Girlvert: A Porno Memoir [Paperback] - 04/13/11 07:22 PM

Quote:

Glad to see Dave Naz on the board. Yay!




Why???
Posted by: tattypatty

Re: Girlvert: A Porno Memoir [Paperback] - 04/15/11 10:38 AM

Cuz that nigga is sharp. It's nice to see a dude connected with this biz who isn't a complete shit stain. Stick around, dude...
Posted by: LouCypher

Re: Girlvert: A Porno Memoir [Paperback] - 04/15/11 01:16 PM

pretty sure fatty has made it known in the past that hes not a naz fan.

i agree with tatty though. dave would be fun to have around.
Posted by: Dave Naz

Re: Girlvert: A Porno Memoir [Paperback] - 04/15/11 01:19 PM

Originally Posted By: gia jordan
Glad to see Dave Naz on the board. Yay!

Thanks, Gia.
Posted by: zenman

Re: Girlvert: A Porno Memoir [Paperback] - 04/15/11 10:24 PM

I'm totally obsessed with Dave and Ashley's relationship. I know Dave comes from money. Dave, how does your family feel about you being married to a former porn star? How does Ashley deal with them? Can she hold up in conversation? Just nosy.
Posted by: Uomo Grassissimo!!

Re: Girlvert: A Porno Memoir [Paperback] - 04/15/11 10:40 PM

Quote:
How does Ashley deal with them?


Whenever she's at a loss for words, she shoves her fist down her throat in a "look at me" moment that lets everyone forget for a split second that's she's a worthless, ignorant disease-riddled whore.

Ashley got a present she didn't like once from Dave's grandma. ONCE.

The beating and painful strap-on grandma endured took means no more "gift cards" from the Candle Shack.
Posted by: Anonymous

Re: Girlvert: A Porno Memoir [Paperback] - 04/16/11 07:41 AM

Naz is more than welcome in my book. That avatar, however, has to go. Sorry dude. Call it the price of admission.

Side note: The edit function seems to be working now.
Posted by: Dave Naz

Re: Girlvert: A Porno Memoir [Paperback] - 04/16/11 01:11 PM

Originally Posted By: zenman
Dave, how does your family feel about you being married to a former porn star? How does Ashley deal with them? Can she hold up in conversation? Just nosy.


My family loves Ori & is totally supportive of her book. Ori is very creative, intelligent and has no problem keeping up in conversation.

The book is great. Some people that would normally get thrown under the bus are seen in a positive light and others that are use to being adored aren't mentioned.
A totally different group of people are going to learn of the JM movies too.

And thanks, Lou & JB
Posted by: Uomo Grassissimo!!

Re: Girlvert: A Porno Memoir [Paperback] - 04/16/11 02:06 PM

Quote:
My family loves Ori & is totally supportive of her book. Ori is very creative, intelligent and has no problem keeping up in conversation.


Or more succinctly and bluntly: They aren't very smart [or picky] either.
Posted by: zenman

Re: Girlvert: A Porno Memoir [Paperback] - 04/17/11 04:32 PM

Regardless, she's a good whore. She does good anal. :bananacream:
Posted by: LouCypher

Re: Girlvert: A Porno Memoir [Paperback] - 04/17/11 04:34 PM

Originally Posted By: Dave Naz

And thanks, Lou & JB


no prob dave..welcome and have fun here.
Posted by: Anonymous

Re: Girlvert: A Porno Memoir [Paperback] - 04/17/11 04:38 PM

Naz, you're welcome, but, seriously, fix the av. Beyond that, though, Welcome aboard.
Posted by: Cum Stains

Re: Girlvert: A Porno Memoir [Paperback] - 04/18/11 03:10 AM

Surely not a surprise that i say Dave Naz's avatar is great!
Posted by: backdoorman

Re: Girlvert: A Porno Memoir [Paperback] - 04/18/11 07:33 AM

Uh yeah... el soopreez !
Posted by: nassim

Re: Girlvert: A Porno Memoir [Paperback] - 05/04/11 05:30 AM

Publish it, dammit! The delivery date keeps getting paged back.
Posted by: Spunko

Re: Girlvert: A Porno Memoir [Paperback] - 05/04/11 02:01 PM

Seriously,I pre-ordered this back in early March,for a late March release and it's been delayed twice by Amazon.


Off your ass Naz.
Posted by: LouCypher

Re: Girlvert: A Porno Memoir [Paperback] - 05/04/11 02:08 PM

i'm guessing it has something to do with the plucking pubes video.
Posted by: Jerkules

Re: Girlvert: A Porno Memoir [Paperback] - 05/04/11 02:27 PM

Gotta get special permits to ship whore parts across state lines.
Posted by: Uomo Grassissimo!!

Re: Girlvert: A Porno Memoir [Paperback] - 05/04/11 07:27 PM

Maybe it need to make a goal in pre-pub sales before it gets printed/released.

OR

Maybe there's some stuff in it that hasn't passed the publisher's legal approval.
Posted by: Dave Naz

Re: Girlvert: A Porno Memoir [Paperback] - 05/05/11 02:01 PM

Originally Posted By: Spunko
Seriously,I pre-ordered this back in early March,for a late March release and it's been delayed twice by Amazon.


There were a few delays, both print and legal, but the book is being printed now and will be released soon.

Here's a short excerpt:

It took us over seven hours to drive from Las Vegas to
Hollywood. There was so much traffic because it was Labor
Day Weekend. I had no idea. Nationally observed holidays had
come to mean nothing to me. I rarely checked the mailbox. I
hardly ever got up before three in the afternoon—and after this
misadventure, I wasn’t sure I ever wanted to get up again.
Tyler and Carmelita fucked and she sucked his dick for four
of those seven hours. They cuddled in the interims when his
cock needed a rest. But she kept her hand on it, stroking it the
entire time. Halfway home, I began to hate her. At first I was
only mad at Tyler, but couldn’t remain so for long. He was my
boyfriend. So I shifted my rage to her. She took advantage of a
tempestuous relationship under odd circumstances. I dried my
tears and toughed it out, letting her get fucked by the man I
loved and lived with.
At last, we arrived at Nelson’s place. I popped the trunk and
gave Carmelita a firm hug. Tyler kissed her goodnight, deeply
with tongue, and we left her outside on the curb.
Posted by: Uomo Grassissimo!!

Re: Girlvert: A Porno Memoir [Paperback] - 05/05/11 03:00 PM

Is that the passage you jerk off to?

When you do, do you imagine yourself to be Ashley, Tyler or Carmelita?
Posted by: nassim

Re: Girlvert: A Porno Memoir [Paperback] - 05/05/11 08:43 PM

Damn! That's some fine prose - comparable to <I>Candy Girl</I> by Diablo Cody.
Posted by: Mark_J

Re: Girlvert: A Porno Memoir [Paperback] - 05/05/11 09:44 PM

Originally Posted By: Dave Naz
Here's a short excerpt:

It took us over seven hours to drive from Las Vegas to Hollywood. There was so much traffic because it was Labor Day Weekend. I had no idea. Nationally observed holidays had come to mean nothing to me. I rarely checked the mailbox. I hardly ever got up before three in the afternoon—and after this misadventure, I wasn’t sure I ever wanted to get up again. Tyler and Carmelita fucked and she sucked his dick for four of those seven hours. They cuddled in the interims when his cock needed a rest. But she kept her hand on it, stroking it the entire time. Halfway home, I began to hate her. At first I was only mad at Tyler, but couldn’t remain so for long. He was my boyfriend. So I shifted my rage to her. She took advantage of a tempestuous relationship under odd circumstances. I dried my tears and toughed it out, letting her get fucked by the man I loved and lived with. At last, we arrived at Nelson’s place. I popped the trunk and gave Carmelita a firm hug. Tyler kissed her goodnight, deeply with tongue, and we left her outside on the curb.


If jeff swoops in like vince mcmahon and says AINT NO WAY: you must be half-mad from lack of warmth, liquids or humor because the Girlvert character is property of the WWE, then considering the excerpt which may not have "it" i'd say alternate titles to explore maybe "Brain Surgery On-Parade" and "I'm basically Kurt Vonnegut Jr"
Posted by: backdoorman

Re: Girlvert: A Porno Memoir [Paperback] - 05/05/11 11:38 PM

I couldn't read any of it for the dude with the big dick making me want to puke.
Posted by: Cum Stains

Re: Girlvert: A Porno Memoir [Paperback] - 05/06/11 03:12 AM

Originally Posted By: backdoorman
I couldn't read any of it for the dude with the big dick making me want to puke.


practice your deep throat skills so you don't puke. smile
Posted by: backdoorman

Re: Girlvert: A Porno Memoir [Paperback] - 05/06/11 09:02 AM

Nyuk, you're welcome for setting you up you big fag ! laugh
Posted by: zenman

Re: Girlvert: A Porno Memoir [Paperback] - 05/06/11 08:05 PM

Originally Posted By: Dave Naz


Here's a short excerpt:

It took us over seven hours to drive from Las Vegas to
Hollywood. There was so much traffic because it was Labor
Day Weekend. I had no idea. Nationally observed holidays had
come to mean nothing to me. I rarely checked the mailbox. I
hardly ever got up before three in the afternoon—and after this
misadventure, I wasn’t sure I ever wanted to get up again.
Tyler and Carmelita fucked and she sucked his dick for four
of those seven hours. They cuddled in the interims when his
cock needed a rest. But she kept her hand on it, stroking it the
entire time. Halfway home, I began to hate her. At first I was
only mad at Tyler, but couldn’t remain so for long. He was my
boyfriend. So I shifted my rage to her. She took advantage of a
tempestuous relationship under odd circumstances. I dried my
tears and toughed it out, letting her get fucked by the man I
loved and lived with.
At last, we arrived at Nelson’s place. I popped the trunk and
gave Carmelita a firm hug. Tyler kissed her goodnight, deeply
with tongue, and we left her outside on the curb.

It needs serious editing:


It took us over seven hours to drive from Las Vegas to Hollywood since it was the Labor Day Weekend and I had not been prepared for the traffic. I was leading a pretty disorganized life, so nationally recognized holidays had come to mean nothing to me. I rarely checked the mailbox, and hardly ever got out of bed before three in the afternoon. After this misadventure, I wasn't sure I ever wanted to get up again.

During the trip Tyler and Carmelita fucked continually in the back seat, and when they weren't fucking she sucked his dick--four of the seven hours. They cuddled in the interim when he needed a rest, but even when they weren't copulating, she never took her had off his cock. At the outset of the trip I was mad only at Tyler: we had had a tempestuous relationship and romantically we were in dire straits. But this was an odd situation, and Carmelita was exploiting every weakness in that relationship. I began to hate her. But I dried my tears and toughed it out, even as she was being fucked by the man I lived with and loved. When we finally arrived at Nelson's place, I popped the trunk and gave Carmelita a firm, good-natured hug. Tyler kissed her goodnight, deeply - and notably - with tongue. Tyler got in the car, and as we drove off I could see her in the rear view mirror, alone on the curb.
Posted by: Random

Re: Girlvert: A Porno Memoir [Paperback] - 05/06/11 10:18 PM

Originally Posted By: zenman

It needs serious editing:


It took us over seven hours to drive from Las Vegas to Hollywood since it was the Labor Day Weekend and I had not been prepared for the traffic. I was leading a pretty disorganized life, so nationally recognized holidays had come to mean nothing to me. I rarely checked the mailbox, and hardly ever got out of bed before three in the afternoon. After this misadventure, I wasn't sure I ever wanted to get up again.

During the trip Tyler and Carmelita fucked continually in the back seat, and when they weren't fucking she sucked his dick--four of the seven hours. They cuddled in the interim when he needed a rest, but even when they weren't copulating, she never took her had off his cock. At the outset of the trip I was mad only at Tyler: we had had a tempestuous relationship and romantically we were in dire straits. But this was an odd situation, and Carmelita was exploiting every weakness in that relationship. I began to hate her. But I dried my tears and toughed it out, even as she was being fucked by the man I lived with and loved. When we finally arrived at Nelson's place, I popped the trunk and gave Carmelita a firm, good-natured hug. Tyler kissed her goodnight, deeply - and notably - with tongue. Tyler got in the car, and as we drove off I could see her in the rear view mirror, alone on the curb.


Better, for sure, but I think she's shooting for a Bukowski-type vibe with her prose. Typical for hipster "writers" who really have no idea what they're doing.
Posted by: zenman

Re: Girlvert: A Porno Memoir [Paperback] - 05/06/11 10:31 PM

I know the whore reads Bukkowski
Posted by: Uomo Grassissimo!!

Re: Girlvert: A Porno Memoir [Paperback] - 05/07/11 04:26 PM

I'm pretty sure I can sum up her book in a quick two word review familiar to all.

"Whores Lie."
Posted by: nassim

Re: Girlvert: A Porno Memoir [Paperback] - 05/23/11 08:30 AM

Finally! Book should ship june 2nd or 3d.
Posted by: Uomo Grassissimo!!

Re: Girlvert: A Porno Memoir [Paperback] - 05/23/11 08:35 AM

Posted by: Barry the Pirate

Re: Girlvert: A Porno Memoir [Paperback] - 05/23/11 09:52 AM

Living on porn whore time.
Posted by: the unknown pervert

Re: Girlvert: A Porno Memoir [Paperback] - 05/23/11 04:34 PM

May I note that he didn't specify any particular year on the shipping date?
Posted by: Dave Naz

Re: Girlvert: A Porno Memoir [Paperback] - 05/23/11 11:11 PM

The book ships this week.

Launch party in NY this Wed at powerHouse Arena 9PM details here: http://davenaz.org/
Posted by: Smelly Monkey

Re: Girlvert: A Porno Memoir [Paperback] - 05/24/11 03:04 AM

Originally Posted By: Dave Naz
Quote:

awesome. $200 a pop is it?. i hope you make bank dave and ori.. i really do.

one question though. is the cat featured at all?. the white one. i was going to pay gj hundreds to swipe that fucker.


Thank you, I do too. The cat & dog are both featured in the book.



Hey Dav, big fan of whatever work it is you do. I have a quick question/observation or two.

1) Do you find it as strange as I do that, at one point you could get ashley blue for less than the asking price of her limited edition book

2) Isn't getting endorsed as an author, by James Frey on par, with having Adolf Hitler give you his backing as a humanitarian?
Posted by: Uomo Grassissimo!!

Re: Girlvert: A Porno Memoir [Paperback] - 05/24/11 05:31 AM

Originally Posted By: NYC geography challenged
Launch party in NY this Wed at powerHouse Arena 9PM


That's not in NY, you idiot. That's BROOKLYN.
Posted by: Uomo Grassissimo!!

Re: Girlvert: A Porno Memoir [Paperback] - 05/27/11 02:34 PM

So ... anyone go to DUMBO to see Dumbo?

Anyone? Anyone??



























::crickets::
Posted by: Bornyo

Re: Girlvert: A Porno Memoir [Paperback] - 05/27/11 09:11 PM

Has the book been issued yet? I actually have a prurient interest in reading it, without the pubic hair.

Can pornwhores not print books?
Posted by: Uomo Grassissimo!!

Re: Girlvert: A Porno Memoir [Paperback] - 05/27/11 09:59 PM

It's for sale on Amazon. They still have the one copy they started with left.



If you spent $18 on it and want to sell it back, they'll give you a gift certificate for 35 cents. [not kidding]



FREE TWO DAY SHIPPING FOR STUDENTS!!!
Posted by: Spunko

Re: Girlvert: A Porno Memoir [Paperback] - 05/28/11 12:13 AM

Finally received my copy 2 days ago. Haven't started reading it yet,I'm in the middle of another book.
Posted by: Dave Naz

Re: Girlvert: A Porno Memoir [Paperback] - 05/28/11 10:41 AM

Originally Posted By: Bornyo
Has the book been issued yet? I actually have a prurient interest in reading it, without the pubic hair.


The book is in stock at Amazon now. powerHouse Arena N.Y., Book Soup & Stories (Echo Park) have copies now.
Posted by: nassim

Re: Girlvert: A Porno Memoir [Paperback] - 05/28/11 02:59 PM

It is a very good read - got through ninety pages yesterday - though the references to doing coke or crystal meth every other sentence gets a little repetitive.
Posted by: Uomo Grassissimo!!

Re: Girlvert: A Porno Memoir [Paperback] - 05/28/11 06:58 PM

Originally Posted By: Dave Naz
The book is in stock at Amazon now.


That 35 cent buy back has restocked the shelves, huh?
Posted by: Uomo Grassissimo!!

Re: Girlvert: A Porno Memoir [Paperback] - 05/30/11 05:30 PM

People who have bought this book on Amazon have also purchased:

NEU SEX by Sasha Grey
News, Nudity & Nonsense: The Best of Vice Magazine Vol. II 2003-2008 [Sasha on cover]
How To Become Clairvoyant by Robbie Robertson
My First Dictionary: Corrupting Young Minds One Word at a Time by Ross Horsley
Crysis 2 - Electronic Arts
Natural Born Killers [Unrated Director's Cut]
The King of Limbs - Radiohead
Living in the End Times by Slavoj Zizek
Posted by: nassim

Re: Girlvert: A Porno Memoir [Paperback] - 05/30/11 09:49 PM

What's not to like about Vice magazine? A bunch of Canadian guys making good in NYC, and laughing all the way to the bank at a time when most magazines and newspapers see nothing but barrels of red ink in the future.
Posted by: Claude Goddard

Re: Girlvert: A Porno Memoir [Paperback] - 05/31/11 01:12 AM

Vice is the worse hipster shit on the planet. Those Vice travel videos in particular are terrible, emo wusses either can't climb a hill and are scared of a black metal closet case, or stumble around Africa scared more shitless than Jig 'cause there are black people everywhere.

Posted by: Uomo Grassissimo!!

Re: Girlvert: A Porno Memoir [Paperback] - 05/31/11 05:43 AM

Originally Posted By: nassim
What's not to like about Vice magazine?


Not making judgments. Just listing what is REALLY on Amazon.
Posted by: Jeff Steward

Re: Girlvert: A Porno Memoir [Paperback] - 07/02/11 10:47 AM

Ori changed some of the names in her book so im going to fill in some of those blanks for all of you. Im only on page 127 so there will be more to come.

Colby = Im not sure but I wil come back to this one
Victor Viewer = Vince Voyuer
Chet/Jon = Jon Dough
Spike = Still not sure
Pro Trusion = Come on, we all know who that is
Roach = Skeeter
Guinevere = Bridgette Kerkove
Posted by: Barry the Pirate

Re: Girlvert: A Porno Memoir [Paperback] - 07/02/11 11:19 AM

Roach = Skeeter. Was there ever a truer fake name?
Posted by: Uomo Grassissimo!!

Re: Girlvert: A Porno Memoir [Paperback] - 07/02/11 01:53 PM

I would prefer Bupkis for him. It has come to mean an extreme form of "utterly worthless", but comes from a slang for goat dung.

For his disgusting surgically monstrosity of a half-tranny I would have gone with something reptilian ... Allosaurus sound like a good first draft. Heinous, frightening, second or third or fourth string to a T-Rex, and she's certainly a "different lizard".
Posted by: Barry the Pirate

Re: Girlvert: A Porno Memoir [Paperback] - 07/02/11 04:53 PM

Love the fanboi reviews on Amazon. A porn Hemingway. Fuck me. Hopefully a move to Ketchum is in the offing.
Posted by: LouCypher

Re: Girlvert: A Porno Memoir [Paperback] - 07/02/11 05:11 PM

links?.
Posted by: Claude Goddard

Re: Girlvert: A Porno Memoir [Paperback] - 07/02/11 05:47 PM

More translations:

Jackal = Jake Malone
Whiny boyfriend Tyler = Trent Tesoro
Whiny boyfriend II Kris = David Stanley
B-Bone = Brandon Iron
Cosmo = Clive McLean
Marco = Sal Genoa

Nelson the limey = Johnni Darkko?
Posted by: Uomo Grassissimo!!

Re: Girlvert: A Porno Memoir [Paperback] - 07/02/11 05:53 PM

Likely to end like Margaux Hemingway.
Posted by: Claude Goddard

Re: Girlvert: A Porno Memoir [Paperback] - 07/02/11 05:57 PM

Ashley praises Bridgette as the pinnacle of beauty in the book, she obviously has some odd standards, she also describes old man Max as handsome.

Jim Powers is one of the few to come out of the book looking good btw, obviously some father/daughter-like love there, but not the way Coke liked it.

smirk
Posted by: Uomo Grassissimo!!

Re: Girlvert: A Porno Memoir [Paperback] - 07/02/11 06:29 PM



Sublime, no?
Posted by: Barry the Pirate

Re: Girlvert: A Porno Memoir [Paperback] - 07/02/11 06:33 PM

http://www.amazon.com/Girlvert-Porno-Mem...0333&sr=8-1

Only 2 reviews. But what's lacking in numbers is madeupinWhite Knighthood.

Boss, is it Old Man and the Sea or what?
Posted by: LouCypher

Re: Girlvert: A Porno Memoir [Paperback] - 07/02/11 06:46 PM

newsmaker and evl are naz. what else?.

i'm sensing a 15 user pm thread conglomerate type thing to set some shit straight.
Posted by: Uomo Grassissimo!!

Re: Girlvert: A Porno Memoir [Paperback] - 07/02/11 07:44 PM

She's fucked more than that at one time, no?
Posted by: Jeff Steward

Re: Girlvert: A Porno Memoir [Paperback] - 07/02/11 10:18 PM

Originally Posted By: Claude Goddard
More translations:

Jackal = Jake Malone
Whiny boyfriend Tyler = Trent Tesoro
Whiny boyfriend II Kris = David Stanley
B-Bone = Brandon Iron
Cosmo = Clive McLean
Marco = Sal Genoa

Nelson the limey = Johnni Darkko?


Wrong, Kris is Johnni Darkko. David Stanley aka applescaucer I dont think even made it in the book. Fucking fag that he is.
Posted by: Claude Goddard

Re: Girlvert: A Porno Memoir [Paperback] - 07/03/11 12:08 AM

Ah, good call. I should have paid more attention to the name of his company Vice Seraph, but I figured it was Stanley because he worked for Vivid, didn't realize someone working for Evil Angel would look down on JM movies.
confused
Posted by: Spunko

Re: Girlvert: A Porno Memoir [Paperback] - 07/03/11 12:30 PM

Pretty sure Nelson the Limey is Derek Hay.
Posted by: mallocup

Re: Girlvert: A Porno Memoir [Paperback] - 07/03/11 03:11 PM

I never really got into the whole gagging thing, but she had a sweet ass. She was great on the Naughty Show podcast too.

Linky: http://deathsquad.tv/?p=74
Posted by: LouCypher

Re: Girlvert: A Porno Memoir [Paperback] - 07/03/11 03:49 PM

heh... good call mc. she did a great job in that interview.
Posted by: Jeff Steward

Re: Girlvert: A Porno Memoir [Paperback] - 07/09/11 07:55 PM

Originally Posted By: Spunko
Pretty sure Nelson the Limey is Derek Hay.


You are correct.
Posted by: Jeff Steward

Re: Girlvert: A Porno Memoir [Paperback] - 07/11/11 08:04 PM

B - bone = Brandon iron
Posted by: charin

Re: Girlvert: A Porno Memoir [Paperback] - 09/11/11 01:06 PM

I just read this the last couple days. The first 2/3 of the book is a cocaine fueled failed romance. It goes tangental to describe various parties. I guess it was worth the read for the graphical stories of porn shoots, what it's like to fist her own ass, etc. I was surprised she never really had her shit together, she blew all her money and owed back taxes. Strange girl, really. She was doing DP's and double anal before porno. Seems like she is really happy with Naz, I wish them well, and look forward to more Girlverts.

Sissy = Missy Monroe??
Whippet = Scott Lyons??

"Blowjobs in this fashion are not always the best feeling, but the visual effect is most stimulating"
-Ashley Blue, regarding Gag Factor
Posted by: RenfieldGyps

Re: Girlvert: A Porno Memoir [Paperback] - 09/27/12 11:19 AM

I enjoyed it big time, read it 2x.
Posted by: mallocup

Re: Girlvert: A Porno Memoir [Paperback] - 09/29/12 07:02 AM

Originally Posted By: Jeff Steward
Ori changed some of the names in her book so im going to fill in some of those blanks for all of you. Im only on page 127 so there will be more to come.

Colby = Im not sure but I wil come back to this one
Victor Viewer = Vince Voyuer
Chet/Jon = Jon Dough
Spike = Still not sure
Pro Trusion = Come on, we all know who that is
Roach = Skeeter
Guinevere = Bridgette Kerkove


enjoyed the fuck out of this book. the missus was reading 50 shades of grey and it was a laugh to compare the depth of smut that each explored.

I got jon dough, skeeter and bridgette, but who was pro trusion?
Posted by: frankie fatale

Re: Girlvert: A Porno Memoir [Paperback] - 09/29/12 08:12 AM

khan tusion?
Posted by: mallocup

Re: Girlvert: A Porno Memoir [Paperback] - 10/03/12 07:11 AM

ah, yes well that would make sense. I'm way out of the loop. never really was into that whole beyond hardcore thing anyway..
Posted by: smutspov

Re: Girlvert: A Porno Memoir [Paperback] - 10/03/12 09:03 AM

Meatholes had way too many scenes with Dirty Harry. I would've liked to have seen somebody bitch slap him with a baseball bat instead. Ashley Blue only did a few good scenes, all for JM, the rest for other studios were garbage.
Posted by: MoronBoy

Re: Girlvert: A Porno Memoir [Paperback] - 10/03/12 07:06 PM

Late to the party(or is this like high school, again, and I was never invited?), but I came home from work today to find this waiting on me in the mailbox.

Knocked out about half of it already. Interesting tale of depravity. Feels very honest. The chapter about Pro Trusion made me have to set the book down for a while. Chilling, frightening stuff. So far, the way she writing about her sex, drug, porn lifestyle with Tyler is just hard for me to wrap my brain around. It sounds fun, tragic, exciting, miserable, and just about every other feeling one can imagine or experience all at the same time. Half of myself is telling me to go out, buy a bunch of drugs and pick up some crazy young woman and have the time of my freaking life, while the more rational part is telling me be glad I have stayed far away from this type of thing.
Posted by: mallocup

Re: Girlvert: A Porno Memoir [Paperback] - 10/04/12 09:13 AM

she did do a good job of saying 'this happened, it was fun as fuck but..'.. without being too preachy either way.

I'm with you moronboy, it definitely made me yearn for my coke (and everything else) fueled nights of debauchery gone by.

juggsy: you are missed..

Posted by: Colin King

Re: Girlvert: A Porno Memoir [Paperback] - 01/21/14 07:07 AM

I hope I'm not too late to this awesome discussion. I have a question regarding the identity of one of the earliest names mentioned in the book, Bent Brent. He appears on page 71, at Miss Small's first scene for Khan Tusion aka Pro Trusion.

He is someone I am not familiar with and really need to know who he is. Can any of you perverts please help?

------------

Here's a summary of the identification so far, please correct me if I'm wrong:

Victor Viewer = Vince Voyuer
Chet/Jon = Jon Dough
Pro Trusion = Khan Tusion
Roach = Skeeter
Guinevere = Bridgette Kerkove
Jackal = Jake Malone
Whiny boyfriend Tyler = Trent Tesoro
Whiny boyfriend II Kris = Johnni Darkko
B-Bone = Brandon Iron
Cosmo = Clive McLean
Marco = Sal Genoa
Nelson the Limey = Derek Hay
Sissy = Missy Monroe
Whippet = Scott Lyons

Names that still haven't been identified:

Colby =
Spike =
Bent Brent =
Posted by: Sunfm

Re: Girlvert: A Porno Memoir [Paperback] - 02/25/18 10:20 PM

Originally Posted By: Colin King
I hope I'm not too late to this awesome discussion. I have a question regarding the identity of one of the earliest names mentioned in the book, Bent Brent. He appears on page 71, at Miss Small's first scene for Khan Tusion aka Pro Trusion.

He is someone I am not familiar with and really need to know who he is. Can any of you perverts please help?

------------

Here's a summary of the identification so far, please correct me if I'm wrong:

Victor Viewer = Vince Voyuer
Chet/Jon = Jon Dough
Pro Trusion = Khan Tusion
Roach = Skeeter
Guinevere = Bridgette Kerkove
Jackal = Jake Malone
Whiny boyfriend Tyler = Trent Tesoro
Whiny boyfriend II Kris = Johnni Darkko
B-Bone = Brandon Iron
Cosmo = Clive McLean
Marco = Sal Genoa
Nelson the Limey = Derek Hay
Sissy = Missy Monroe
Whippet = Scott Lyons

Names that still haven't been identified:

Colby =
Spike =
Bent Brent =


I realize I'm digging up a four year old thread to answer a question by someone with only one post who will almost certainly not even see this, but I recently read the book and just found this thread. I'm not 100% sure of Bent Brent, I've seen the vid in question but I can't ID the actor. It was supposed to be for Oral Consumption but I don't think it was released on DVD and just ended up on the Meat Holes website. He looks like he might be Brett Rockman? That seems to fit the theme of most names in the book only being changed slightly. Colby is a Norwegian musician named Toby, he did music for a shitload of old Anabolic videos under the name "Toby the Viking". Pretty much any Anabolic/ Diabolic flick from the late 90's to mid 2000's with an annoying 4/4 electronic soundtrack is him. Spike is Mike John.