Xbiz article

Posted by: Holly Randall

Xbiz article - 04/28/07 11:39 AM

Xbiz has revamped their site and have now started posting my monthly column online. Though this isn't the first article I've written for them, it's the first one they posted. A couple of you asked where you could find these fantastic pieces of literature online, so here you are: http://xbiz.com/article_piece.php?cat=36&id=22723

Try not to compare me to Hemingway. Really, it's getting old.
Posted by: J.B.

Re: Xbiz article - 04/28/07 12:09 PM

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Then, of course, we get the beautiful girls who think they are ugly, and the ugly girls who think they are beautiful. A female's skewed perception of herself never fails to amaze me. I've had girls who bemoan an imaginary pot belly and girls with what look like bowling balls of flesh attached to their chest that hail their "fantastic" new boob job.



Well Done, Holly.
Posted by: IWAdult

Re: Xbiz article - 04/28/07 05:44 PM

This is cool Holly. I will be a regular reader.
Posted by: vanessa

Re: Xbiz article - 04/28/07 06:31 PM

It's the way she arches her back, seduces the camera and lifts the corners of her mouth in a way that says, "I know you want me, but you know you can't have me."

Very nicely put! There is something poetic in arching backs that expresses well your appreciation for your models.
Posted by: Gunker

Re: Xbiz article - 04/28/07 07:56 PM

Quote:

It's the way she arches her back, seduces the camera and lifts the corners of her mouth in a way that says, "I know you want me, but you know you can't have me."

Very nicely put! There is something poetic in arching backs that expresses well your appreciation for your models.




And then the dancing Brandon Irons banner add squelches it...
Posted by: Houstondon

Re: Xbiz article - 04/29/07 09:15 AM

Quote:

Try not to compare me to Hemingway. Really, it's getting old.



How about Wild Bill Shakespeare then? Good work!
Posted by: NitneLiun

Re: Xbiz article - 04/29/07 11:06 AM

From the column:

When we admitted that we did, she unquestioningly inquired .....

Ah, I see what you did there.
Posted by: Holly Randall

Re: Xbiz article - 04/29/07 01:52 PM

Quote:

Quote:

Try not to compare me to Hemingway. Really, it's getting old.



How about Wild Bill Shakespeare then? Good work!



Thanks guys, your positive affirmations lifted my spirits. I needed it-- my house was broken into last night so I'm a bit depressed today.
Posted by: Gigi

Re: Xbiz article - 04/29/07 02:20 PM

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Quote:

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Try not to compare me to Hemingway. Really, it's getting old.



How about Wild Bill Shakespeare then? Good work!



Thanks guys, your positive affirmations lifted my spirits. I needed it-- my house was broken into last night so I'm a bit depressed today.

holly's house gets broken into within a week of her announcing here that she lives a block-and-a-half away from that taco place. coincidence? hmmmm...
Posted by: J.B.

Re: Xbiz article - 04/29/07 02:57 PM

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Quote:

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Try not to compare me to Hemingway. Really, it's getting old.



How about Wild Bill Shakespeare then? Good work!



Thanks guys, your positive affirmations lifted my spirits. I needed it-- my house was broken into last night so I'm a bit depressed today.

holly's house gets broken into within a week of her announcing here that she lives a block-and-a-half away from that taco place. coincidence? hmmmm...



Sounds like AC Cream is on the loose again

Seriously, Holly, did they get anything?
Posted by: Holly Randall

Re: Xbiz article - 04/29/07 05:42 PM

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Quote:

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Try not to compare me to Hemingway. Really, it's getting old.



How about Wild Bill Shakespeare then? Good work!



Thanks guys, your positive affirmations lifted my spirits. I needed it-- my house was broken into last night so I'm a bit depressed today.

holly's house gets broken into within a week of her announcing here that she lives a block-and-a-half away from that taco place. coincidence? hmmmm...



Sounds like AC Cream is on the loose again

Seriously, Holly, did they get anything?



Yeah they stole a bunch of my jewelry-- nothing worth anything though, thank god. They did steal my Mac studio laptop with several photoshoots on it (fortunately I backed them up on the studio hard drive). Nothing that's not replaceable-- I just hate the idea of a stranger going through my house (and my underwear drawer).
Posted by: zenman

Re: Xbiz article - 04/29/07 06:38 PM

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I just hate the idea of a stranger going through my house (and my underwear drawer).



Posted by: Gigi

Re: Xbiz article - 04/29/07 06:46 PM

Quote:

Quote:

Quote:

Quote:

Quote:

Quote:

Try not to compare me to Hemingway. Really, it's getting old.



How about Wild Bill Shakespeare then? Good work!



Thanks guys, your positive affirmations lifted my spirits. I needed it-- my house was broken into last night so I'm a bit depressed today.

holly's house gets broken into within a week of her announcing here that she lives a block-and-a-half away from that taco place. coincidence? hmmmm...



Sounds like AC Cream is on the loose again

Seriously, Holly, did they get anything?



Yeah they stole a bunch of my jewelry-- nothing worth anything though, thank god. They did steal my Mac studio laptop with several photoshoots on it (fortunately I backed them up on the studio hard drive). Nothing that's not replaceable-- I just hate the idea of a stranger going through my house (and my underwear drawer).

which one of you pre-verts were looking at holly's girly things?
Posted by: Da Burglar

Holly Randall Burglarized!!!! - 04/30/07 04:30 PM

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I just hate the idea of a stranger going through my house (and my underwear drawer).








yeesh, I miss a few days and all kinds of shit happens, in particular with the epitome of womanly charm and the most erotic woman in Porn, Holly Randall.

have no fear Holly Club Da Burglar Security is on the job, and in fact, we have already cracked the case! it took me a whole 17 seconds after i eliminated Sal Mckvey from the suspect list due to his extremely busy porn shoot schedule...fortunately sal is just TOO fucking busy shooting porn and doing interviews and specials for the Playboy Channel to have the time (or motivation) to break into your home, fondle your unmentionables, whack off on the Kitchen Table and then steal a bunch of shit.

So who does that leave? A person with the TIME, NEED for income, Motive for Revenge or retribution for imagined slights and overextended ego-bruising, plus someone with enough familiarity with your domicile's layout and what and where you keep your stuff, etc etc....

<da burglar takes out pipe, lights it and puffs 3 times> Ladies and Gentlemen, the identity of the Holly Randall Burglar/Underwear Fondler is:





No charge for this Holly. if you want i can come and "sit" guard for a few days outside your entryway, this may be my chance to make you that dinner (see other thread).


Seriously though, I am glad you are ok and nothing serious was taken.
Posted by: Holly Randall

Re: Holly Randall Burglarized!!!! - 04/30/07 05:21 PM

Well forensics came by last night, and they were very excited because the thief left very clear handprints on the outside of the window he opened, and perfect fingerprints were pulled off of it. If this guy has any priors (which is likely) then we'll be able to nail him easily. I did just realize this morning that the tapes from the video that day were in the laptop bag, so I lost the Rebeca Linares/Justin Magnum scene, which was phenomenal.
Posted by: zenman

Re: Holly Randall Burglarized!!!! - 04/30/07 05:34 PM

Quote:

Well forensics came by last night, and they were very excited because the thief left very clear handprints on the outside of the window he opened, and perfect fingerprints were pulled off of it. If this guy has any priors (which is likely) then we'll be able to nail him easily. I did just realize this morning that the tapes from the video that day were in the laptop bag, so I lost the Rebeca Linares/Justin Magnum scene, which was phenomenal.



The police actually came to you house. My place in NY got broken into once and the police said I could stop by the precinct to file a report for insurance purposes but that they were not going to investigate.
Posted by: J.B.

Re: Holly Randall Burglarized!!!! - 04/30/07 05:39 PM

What Precinct was that, Zenman? On Staten Island, NYPD will respond, but it takes several hours (and several phone calls.)
Posted by: zenman

Re: Holly Randall Burglarized!!!! - 04/30/07 05:45 PM

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What Precinct was that, Zenman? On Staten Island, NYPD will respond, but it takes several hours (and several phone calls.)



Queens.
Posted by: Holly Randall

Re: Holly Randall Burglarized!!!! - 04/30/07 05:49 PM

Yes they did come to my house-- noticed my Hustler mags laying around, so I explained what I do. They then asked for my website address. It would be funny if I got a new member out of this.
Posted by: Da Burglar

Re: Holly Randall Burglarized!!!! - 04/30/07 06:03 PM

Quote:

Yes they did come to my house-- noticed my Hustler mags laying around, so I explained what I do. They then asked for my website address. It would be funny if I got a new member out of this.



You wonder if this is how Jack Lawrence was seduced into porn and out of Law Enforcement?
Posted by: k1ng

Re: Holly Randall Burglarized!!!! - 04/30/07 06:08 PM

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The police actually came to you house.



That's what happens when you live in a posh gated community in Cali and your last name is Randall.


Posted by: Holly Randall

Re: Holly Randall Burglarized!!!! - 04/30/07 08:33 PM

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Quote:

The police actually came to you house.



That's what happens when you live in a posh gated community in Cali and your last name is Randall.





LOL, gated my ass. I wish-- maybe then this place wouldn't have been robbed. I live in an area nestled between Venice, Culver City, and Westwood. Not a bad neighborhood, but not the best one either. But I grew up in this house, went to the elementary school across the street, and still have the neighbors whose daughter used to babysit me as a child, so I like it here. It's my home.
Posted by: zenman

Re: Holly Randall Burglarized!!!! - 04/30/07 08:44 PM

You live with your family?
Posted by: k1ng

Re: Holly Randall Burglarized!!!! - 04/30/07 08:48 PM

I know you're replying just to set the record straight, but I was just funnin ya. So, you mean for example, if you get pulled over by a cop and you say "I'm Holly Randall, Suze's daughter." they don't just let you go? "I'm Holly Randall biatch!" doesn't get into all the exclusive clubs and restaurants? That's a damn shame.
Posted by: elaborator

Re: Holly Randall Burglarized!!!! - 04/30/07 08:52 PM

That must be amazing to grow up in the house you grew up in...i get a lil chill when i make the effort to even drive past where i grew up.

You truly live a storybook life Mz Randall.
Posted by: Holly Randall

Re: Holly Randall Burglarized!!!! - 04/30/07 09:34 PM

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You live with your family?



No-- they live in Malibu Canyon/Calabasas, but they never sold the original house they'd bought. When I was 14 we moved, but my parents kept the house, and simply rented it out; first to UCLA students, and then to a family for about 6 years. They kept it because they knew how valuable property was in Los Angeles, and they wanted to have a home to give their children when they grew up. So when I left Santa Barbara and came back down here, I moved back into this house and I've been here ever since.

Quote:

I know you're replying just to set the record straight, but I was just funnin ya. So, you mean for example, if you get pulled over by a cop and you say "I'm Holly Randall, Suze's daughter." they don't just let you go? "I'm Holly Randall biatch!" doesn't get into all the exclusive clubs and restaurants? That's a damn shame.



Hehe I wish saying my name got me into places or out of tickets-- but they only people who know who I am are my dear friends at XPT.
Posted by: Sergio T.

Re: Holly Randall Burglarized!!!! - 04/30/07 10:22 PM

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LOL, gated my ass. I wish-- maybe then this place wouldn't have been robbed. I live in an area nestled between Venice, Culver City, and Westwood. Not a bad neighborhood, but not the best one either.


I used to live in Venice, two blocks from Venice High back when blacks and Latinos wer picking each other off with no discrimination. Old people, women, little kids- everyone was a target.

Mar Vista sucks. Its ghetto as fuck. Even had brief encounter with three skinheads. Pussies.
Posted by: Abe

Re: Holly Randall Burglarized!!!! - 04/30/07 11:14 PM

Meadowbrook Manor is there as well, fine institution it is. The area isn't that ghetto, it's not exactly Inglewood.
Posted by: PainfulAzzFuckin

Re: Xbiz article - 05/01/07 01:33 PM

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Thanks guys, your positive affirmations lifted my spirits. I needed it-- my house was broken into last night so I'm a bit depressed today.



Well if these are/were your socks, I know who the thief is and where you can find yer stuff! Just don't tell Gen I turned her in.


Posted by: todhunter

Re: Holly Randall Burglarized!!!! - 05/01/07 10:49 PM

Quote:

Yes they did come to my house-- noticed my Hustler mags laying around, so I explained what I do. They then asked for my website address. It would be funny if I got a new member out of this.



I would have said "subscriber" myself...



--t
Posted by: NitneLiun

Re: Holly Randall Burglarized!!!! - 05/01/07 11:58 PM

Quote:

Yes they did come to my house-- noticed my Hustler mags laying around, so I explained what I do. They then asked for my website address. It would be funny if I got a new member out of this.



You should have just recited Conky's sig. "I am also subscribe to postal pornography." That would have cleared things up in a hurry.
Posted by: Holly Randall

Re: Holly Randall Burglarized!!!! - 05/07/07 01:30 PM

They put up another article of mine... this one's about rehab. Yay!

http://xbiz.com/article_piece.php?cat=43&id=22852
Posted by: RenfieldGyps

Re: Holly Randall Burglarized!!!! - 05/07/07 04:49 PM

Quote:

They put up another article of mine... this one's about rehab. Yay!

http://xbiz.com/article_piece.php?cat=43&id=22852

That was written really well and inspiring.