In 1995, I almost got hit by a bouncer at NY Dolls [if that's the one on Murray near what was the WTC]. I agreed to go there instead of Harmony Burlesque [that place was too much for me].

I'm not much of a strip club guy. I sit away from the action and only give up my $1 if I really REALLY think the girl is cute. I'm HATE even the idea of a lap dance. So I was really there to keep my married pal company ... and, of course, the free buffet.

Some odd, sad little cutie named "Citra" took a liking to me. Why, I have NO clue. She would sit next to me and talk at length about her dreams to be a park ranger, pediatric nurse and/or a yoga master. She would just sit and talk and talk. I bought her a drink or two, but that was it.

After a couple sets of her going directly from the stage to the empty chair next to me -- thus omitting the "solicit a lap dance" from the gentlemen who had purchased "coupons" for a lapdance from her - a large angry goombah came over to demand that I buy 5 lapdance "coupons" NOW ... if I knew what was good for me ...

I got out my wallet and held up my colorful and quite attractive AG "badge" and asked if "sales tax" was included in the price.


I've never been brave enough to go back.