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Max Online: 3648 @ 01/07/26 06:32 AM
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#111800 - 07/13/05 12:31 PM
AC Cream tribute thread
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Max Hardcore Prison Bitch
Registered: 06/03/05
Posts: 368
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This thread is dedicated to the man that we all know as AC Cream, the world’s latest candidate for Bariatric Surgery. If we could find a way to reduce his meals down to normal-sized portions, I’m sure that we could send the extra food to monkey in Africa where he could use this food to support 5 starving people with. I have also been able to acquire a lost photo of AC Cream from one of my connections over there at ADT and I have provided it as an attachment to this post. What the hell is wrong with this guy is what I would like to know and don’t start in with the genetic connection because I guarantee that this guy averages 10 super-sized value meals per day. My biggest beef with AC is all of the constant sucking up that he does to the porn stars. If he would simply lose a couple hundred pounds, he would be calling the shots instead of graveling at the feet of, in some cases, nasty cracked-out porn whores. One Example: AC sucking up to kinzie in a recent post at adt. Quote:
OK Kinzie,
I think it's time everybody finds out the secret....
Kinzie is carrying my love child! The conception happened the Saturday of Erotica LA. She was looking SO fine in that outfit she wore that Saturday. She asked me to escort her to the ladies room. Who was I to say no? So I did. I stopped at the entrance, but Kinzie said "no AC, come in and stand by the stall". I was very nervous, but agreed. The next thing I know Kinzie is pulling me in the stall with her. At first I was like "OMG!, I'm being molested!", but it doesn't take long for Kinzie to get a man's juices flowing. After that it was on! So YES, Kinzie & I had convention public restroom sex and from this she is pregnant.
I know this child is gonna be a Potty Mouth! Good thing Chef Jeff is gonna step up and be daddy to the little heathen.
AC Cream
I hope she ain’t carrying this motherfucker’s love child, for the love of god this guy will steal the food right out of that baby’s mouth and laugh while he’s eating it. And what about Kinzie, can you imagine her on the floor of that bathroom trying to even find AC’s little member hidden underneath about 100lbs of overlying fat? The thought of it is too much to even stomach.
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#111801 - 07/13/05 02:29 PM
Re: AC Cream tribute thread
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Porn Jesus
Registered: 01/25/04
Posts: 8662
Loc: In a k1ng like state of medioc...
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I can feel the heat, you translate it well to the audience, they can feel every ounce of it. Im liking it, we need more ac stories.
For ac cream if he reads this thread
http://www.austynmoore.net/wish%20list.htm
Edited by smelly monkey (07/13/05 02:30 PM)
_________________________
“Jesus said, hey baby, its all good" Wayne Lewis
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#111802 - 07/13/05 02:36 PM
Re: AC Cream tribute thread
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Porn Jesus
Registered: 03/28/04
Posts: 4450
Loc: The Planet Houston
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HOLY SHIT! she doesn't ask for much... I love the girl...but DAMN! what sucks even more, is that I already bought her a Hello Kitty watch, but she still wants a Rolex. 
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#111804 - 07/13/05 03:04 PM
Re: AC Cream tribute thread
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Porn Jesus
Registered: 04/17/04
Posts: 6005
Loc: travieso capital management an...
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i want to purchase a defender 90, make a cardboard ship to go around it then chase AC around the AVN conventionfloor throwing harpoons into him until he staggers and crashes through the ksex booth.
then i will stuff an apple in his mouth, lash his hands and feet to a giant pole and cook him to feed all of malawi using chasey lain's lightbulb for smoking meth.
ac-if you read this, sleep with one eyer open piggie.
_________________________
"She has no waist, no arse...an interesting face...but all we are really worshipping is two bags of silicone"
Martin Amis "honoring" katie price with a character bearing some of her traits
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#111806 - 07/13/05 04:35 PM
Re: AC Cream tribute thread
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Porn Jesus
Registered: 04/17/04
Posts: 6005
Loc: travieso capital management an...
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p-you mean the scottish novelist? if so, what the fuck are you doing in porn? back to the matter at hand---this is taken from the adt edition of "AC_CREAM on Gluttony: The Unabating Hunger of a Wretched Fanboy" I never knew anything about a Del Taco until I went to CA in March. Del Taco has kick ass fish tacos. Another time I tried their Chicken Quesadilla and it had WAY more chicken than fucking Taco Bell's. Though if I had to pick my Favorite of them all. I would have to say it's Hardees(aka Carls Jr.) when they have the Monster Thickburger on promotion.  () It was how a burger was meant to be. 2 thick ass angus burgers, with 8 strips of bacon, covered with cheese, & topped with Mayo. The only way that burger could be any more perfect is to throw a piece of chicken in between the burgers. That way all the barnyard buddies are together. AC Cream Edited by - AC Cream on 7/13/2005 7:29:01 PM thar he blows!!! AC, my harpoons are sharp and my aim is true, watch out you fat, pathetic estrogenfest.
_________________________
"She has no waist, no arse...an interesting face...but all we are really worshipping is two bags of silicone"
Martin Amis "honoring" katie price with a character bearing some of her traits
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#111807 - 07/13/05 05:42 PM
Re: AC Cream tribute thread
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Porn Jesus
Registered: 04/17/04
Posts: 6005
Loc: travieso capital management an...
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here's my shameless self-promotion what started it all when i consider why i've been reduced to reading the most popular forums less than tech talk and try to identify the crux of what's lame about adt sometimes despite having many users i like--it basically comes down to one thing. ac_cream, i feel your world must be a constantly terrifying place and difficult to make sense of. your posts are invariably met by rebuke by other members for being wrong or libelous and potentially hurfful conjecture. if your post doesn't require an explanation of why it's incorrect it's usually followed by attempts to calm you down. there are some good reasons to lose sleep, take the hyper-paranoid fashion victim in charge of north korea's nukes for example. were he to spend an afternoon with you, i'd expect him to say "you worry about too many things and make my head hurt, silly roundeye. now you are allowed to touch your leader's hair. touch it!". calming you down and correcting you takes up time that could be used to say something interesting, and some days it seems like easing your despair/telling you you're an idiot is responsible for half the bandwidth here. ithere's the possibility this is just misunderstood genius and a man ahead of his time, but i'll focus on another angle. before you post what you want to say, just wait a day or so and think about how your audience will react, practice deep breathing, take klonopin and come back to it in hopes that someone has explained things for you or that the thread is hopefully locked and you can't add more. i'd go as far as to consider "speak only when spoken to" as a good course of action, if only temporarily. this is a great time to be you, stop freaking out all the time. you don't have to worry about being fitted with a pointy hat and sitting apart from your classmates. it's passe to box the ears of those labelled simple and eugenics is too stigmatized to threaten the lives of the weak and stupid. i may get banned for this but someone needs to explain this to you. i'll take one for the team, i feel many are fed up with the chicken-little act, constant application of your personal and pollyanish morality and meritless accusations that require attention not to be hurtful. think before you post, it's driving me nuts. bump for tera's lost dog.
_________________________
"She has no waist, no arse...an interesting face...but all we are really worshipping is two bags of silicone"
Martin Amis "honoring" katie price with a character bearing some of her traits
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#111808 - 07/13/05 07:16 PM
Re: AC Cream tribute thread
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Max Hardcore Prison Bitch
Registered: 06/03/05
Posts: 368
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Quote:
I never knew anything about a Del Taco until I went to CA in March. Del Taco has kick ass fish tacos. Another time I tried their Chicken Quesadilla and it had WAY more chicken than fucking Taco Bell's.
Though if I had to pick my Favorite of them all. I would have to say it's Hardees(aka Carls Jr.) when they have the Monster Thickburger on promotion. () It was how a burger was meant to be. 2 thick ass angus burgers, with 8 strips of bacon, covered with cheese, & topped with Mayo. The only way that burger could be any more perfect is to throw a piece of chicken in between the burgers. That way all the barnyard buddies are together.
AC Cream
LOL.. I initially thought that jamesn made this up but AC really said that. The best part about that whole thread is how there is only one other person who talked more about food then AC, and that other person was condeming fast food for being hazardous to your health.
I also like how he mentioned that he loves del taco- 'fish tacos'. I have had the misfortune of eating at del taco and fish tacos were not on the menu. That is unless you want to include some of Evil Klown's female relatives who were working behind the counter there. But I seriously doubt that even they would have anything to do with this douche.
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#111809 - 07/13/05 07:23 PM
Re: AC Cream tribute thread
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Porn Jesus
Registered: 04/17/04
Posts: 6005
Loc: travieso capital management an...
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i bet he's jerked off to the thought of putting a chicken patty between two cheeseburgers. my main concern is that his arteries will kill him before i get to.
_________________________
"She has no waist, no arse...an interesting face...but all we are really worshipping is two bags of silicone"
Martin Amis "honoring" katie price with a character bearing some of her traits
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#111811 - 07/14/05 02:23 AM
Re: AC Cream tribute thread
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AC Cream Wannabe
Registered: 06/15/05
Posts: 534
Loc: making your feelings hurt with...
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anal crevasse.hes a fanboy of the highest caliber.
_________________________
to those who hate me,you love me.i shouldnt be on your mind-jim jones
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#111817 - 07/15/05 11:17 AM
Re: AC Cream tribute thread
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Max Hardcore Prison Bitch
Registered: 06/03/05
Posts: 368
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Quote:
Nope. He's posting on XPT right now.
What is his alias? PM this to me, I must know!
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#111818 - 07/15/05 01:51 PM
Re: AC Cream tribute thread
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Sex Slave Trader
Registered: 11/14/04
Posts: 1460
Loc: Down there
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This is all I have to say: 
_________________________
I like me some Gia'd Jerkins.
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#111820 - 07/16/05 05:01 PM
Re: AC Cream tribute thread
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Porn Jesus
Registered: 04/17/04
Posts: 6005
Loc: travieso capital management an...
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profileworthy Quote:
Quote:
p-you mean the scottish novelist? if so, what the fuck are you doing in porn?
I did. White Hunter, Black Heart. I am in porn because I love hookers.
_________________________
"She has no waist, no arse...an interesting face...but all we are really worshipping is two bags of silicone"
Martin Amis "honoring" katie price with a character bearing some of her traits
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#111823 - 07/18/05 11:16 AM
Re: AC Cream tribute thread
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Porn Fucking Master
Registered: 04/21/04
Posts: 3899
Loc: CO Springs
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I have no class.
Damn.
_________________________
you mean my days having fun while being fundamentally superior to you? - Jamesn
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#111824 - 07/19/05 11:38 PM
Re: AC Cream tribute thread
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Max Hardcore Prison Bitch
Registered: 06/03/05
Posts: 368
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AC is such a lamer, I can't stand his constant sucking up to kinzie.. a grade C pornstar at best if I were to grade her attractiveness. Now AC has sunk to even lower levels of the unthinkable, he is actually trying to get kinzie to have sex with him and has come up with a new scheme to do it. -->> LINK
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#111826 - 07/20/05 12:48 AM
Re: AC Cream tribute thread
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AC Cream Wannabe
Registered: 06/15/05
Posts: 534
Loc: making your feelings hurt with...
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who the hell is frank3784? is that my code name on that gay board?
_________________________
to those who hate me,you love me.i shouldnt be on your mind-jim jones
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#111828 - 07/22/05 11:09 AM
Re: AC Cream tribute thread
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Rob Black's Crack Pipe
Registered: 03/22/05
Posts: 115
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Code name??? Who the fuck has time for ... That's good shit. I like you, Frankie. Let's have lunch sometime. 
_________________________
Taste the doom of burning.
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#111830 - 07/22/05 05:26 PM
Re: AC Cream tribute thread
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Porn Jesus
Registered: 04/17/04
Posts: 6005
Loc: travieso capital management an...
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i told you guys to be patient with frankie, the kid's figuring it out-2 cage-quality comments in one day between this and stormy, princess of huge foreheads
_________________________
"She has no waist, no arse...an interesting face...but all we are really worshipping is two bags of silicone"
Martin Amis "honoring" katie price with a character bearing some of her traits
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#111831 - 07/22/05 05:38 PM
Re: AC Cream tribute thread
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Porn Jesus
Registered: 03/28/04
Posts: 4450
Loc: The Planet Houston
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Quote:
i told you guys to be patient with frankie, the kid's figuring it out-2 cage-quality comments in one day between this and stormy, princess of huge foreheads
naw dude. ..you got it all wrong.
he's like the dumb brother who gets all F's then one day comes home with a D- and everyone busts a nut...all the while other cats who are scoring A's & B's get over looked.
keep it real. a one hit wonder does not a cage legend make.
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#111832 - 07/22/05 06:07 PM
Re: AC Cream tribute thread
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Porn Jesus
Registered: 04/17/04
Posts: 6005
Loc: travieso capital management an...
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i thought those two were pretty funny, in a frankie-sort of way. toe's with me on this one, right?
_________________________
"She has no waist, no arse...an interesting face...but all we are really worshipping is two bags of silicone"
Martin Amis "honoring" katie price with a character bearing some of her traits
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#111834 - 07/22/05 07:51 PM
Re: AC Cream tribute thread
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Max Hardcore Prison Bitch
Registered: 06/03/05
Posts: 368
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Quote:
I will give 10 bucks in Del Taco Gift certificates to the first XPT smart fuck who figures out my identity over there before my 10th post....I will try not to make it obvious. On a side note, I was always partial to Green Burrito over Del Taco when I lived in So Cal....fucking fat fucks and their fast food addictions....
Now this sounds interesting, just be sure to save a copy of what you post over there so that we can read it if Steph decides to delete it.
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#111835 - 07/22/05 09:26 PM
Re: AC Cream tribute thread
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Porn Jesus
Registered: 09/23/04
Posts: 10321
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Quote:
i thought those two were pretty funny, in a frankie-sort of way. toe's with me on this one, right?
Sorry JimmyBoston, here's where we part ways. I've tried to look at his drivel as a fake account and as a real person and I see no redeeming qualities. None.
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#111840 - 07/23/05 07:06 AM
Re: AC Cream tribute thread
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Rob Black's Crack Pipe
Registered: 03/22/05
Posts: 115
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Bob the Builder? That's cool. I love heavy equipment.
_________________________
Taste the doom of burning.
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#111842 - 07/23/05 08:27 AM
Re: AC Cream tribute thread
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Rob Black's Crack Pipe
Registered: 03/22/05
Posts: 115
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 Sometimes the jokes just write themselves, don't they? Well, see you around. I don't have anything to say about AC, good or bad. It occurs to me that I would be admitting something to myself about my inability to amuse myself some other way.
_________________________
Taste the doom of burning.
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#111847 - 07/25/05 08:49 AM
Re: AC Cream tribute thread
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Gay For Pay
Registered: 07/23/04
Posts: 931
Loc: United States
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somtimes I wish I could meet these little bitches like razor in person so I could kick him in his teeth 
_________________________
PORN.....I love this stuff
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#111848 - 07/25/05 10:06 AM
Re: AC Cream tribute thread
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Gay For Pay
Registered: 04/06/05
Posts: 959
Loc: The Outer Labia of Jenna Haze
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Shes not even worth anyones time, shes a step above Frankie only because she seems to post less. Razor im loving the your momma jokes, quite original, why didnt you just say something like your momms so fat she uses the freeway as a slip n slide, or Yo mama so ugly instead of putting the bungee cord around her ankle, they put it around her neck..SNAP. Fuck you Razor, whats your name next week going to be you faggot? If your constant changing of aliases on a message board is any indication of how confused and fucked up you are, I'd probably put you in Smartts category of being a leading candidate for real life role of Buffalo Bill. "Biff rubs the lotion on its Skin, it places the lotion in the basket."
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jrv im going to fucking kill you and 3 of your family members-SM
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#111849 - 07/25/05 10:31 AM
Re: AC Cream tribute thread
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Sex Slave Trader
Registered: 11/14/04
Posts: 1460
Loc: Down there
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#111851 - 07/25/05 12:03 PM
Re: AC Cream tribute thread
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Gay For Pay
Registered: 04/06/05
Posts: 959
Loc: The Outer Labia of Jenna Haze
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I am  Look at the bitch Razor's avatar. Who says I quit? Here let me start speaking so that you can understand whats going on.....I am what I eat, pussy. Is that childish enough for your trannie mind? Like I said yesterday shouldnt you be lubing up your colon getting prepared for your double anal shoot that youve got lined up for Evil Angel this afternoon
_________________________
jrv im going to fucking kill you and 3 of your family members-SM
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#111852 - 07/25/05 12:33 PM
Re: AC Cream tribute thread
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Porn Jesus
Registered: 08/09/06
Posts: 9113
Loc: red dirt state of mind
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Things I see when I look at AC Cream: Bryant “Big Country†Reeves fat mongoloid brother. Bryant ReevesA chicken patty between two cheeseburgers. Man Boobs. Acne so bad Stridex is thinking of signing his ass. A douche bag. A restraining order waiting to happen.
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#111853 - 07/25/05 01:03 PM
Re: AC Cream tribute thread
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Porn Jesus
Registered: 04/17/04
Posts: 6005
Loc: travieso capital management an...
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excellent points have2--i'm also amused at how his facial hair has grown in so weirdly. i'm attributing this to the inherent difficulty the morbidly-obese face in being able to pull gooey slabs of flesh out of the crevices they form. it must be like trying to shave the inside of an armenian vagina or something.
_________________________
"She has no waist, no arse...an interesting face...but all we are really worshipping is two bags of silicone"
Martin Amis "honoring" katie price with a character bearing some of her traits
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#111855 - 07/25/05 01:27 PM
Re: AC Cream tribute thread
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Sex Slave Trader
Registered: 11/14/04
Posts: 1460
Loc: Down there
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I have another gem to share. AC on myspace
_________________________
I like me some Gia'd Jerkins.
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#111856 - 07/25/05 01:40 PM
Re: AC Cream tribute thread
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Porn Jesus
Registered: 08/09/06
Posts: 9113
Loc: red dirt state of mind
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Quote:
Ace's Blurbs
About me:
I am a young man in a point in my life where I need to make a decision for my future. What that is I'm not quite sure yet, but I know it has to happen soon.
2 words: sexual re-assignment.
Since he's already the worlds biggest cunt he might as well get 1 for real.
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#111857 - 07/25/05 02:03 PM
Re: AC Cream tribute thread
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Gay For Pay
Registered: 05/06/04
Posts: 951
Loc: IL
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AC would be great for my next snuff film. AC plays the guy who milks cows on his grandpa's farm and Melissa is the nasty farmer's cousin's niece. Melissa catches AC attempting to ram his bulbous head into a fertile cow's anus. She decides to punish him. to be continued...
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#111858 - 07/25/05 05:46 PM
Re: AC Cream tribute thread
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Porn Jesus
Registered: 04/17/04
Posts: 6005
Loc: travieso capital management an...
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ladies and gentlemen, even your pets and brazilians---our boy's totally fucking lost it and is on an inventing religions-kick.
"All religion blows. Faith is cool. Spirituality is cool. BUT living your life according to a book another flawed human wrote is non-sense to me.
I personally think we are a banished alien race. From some planet so far off in space we don't even know it exists. I think all the "downed weather balloons" are other banished races that weren't able to survive the trip. I'm not saying everybody should believe this. Just what I believe.
Though I do like Cumwhippers idea....
Kinzie-ism....
As I wake up today,
To Kinzie I pray,
May I meet beautiful women that say,
I'm having such a wonderful day,
May they smile big and bright,
From much joy and delight,
Let them know I'm alright,
so they won't run from fright,
May I find happiness real soon,
Help me not be such a buffoon,
Cause I want to lick on some poon,
Please bring me a Thick.... Dark Haired.... Tinted Skinned.... Sweet.... Respectful.... hottie who loves me so all night we can spoon,
Kinzie if you can help in any way,
Make things happen with all your might,
Tonight when the day is done I will look at the moon,
And say.... Oh beautiful Kinzie all praise be to you.
AC Cream
_________________________
"She has no waist, no arse...an interesting face...but all we are really worshipping is two bags of silicone"
Martin Amis "honoring" katie price with a character bearing some of her traits
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#111859 - 07/25/05 09:42 PM
Re: AC Cream tribute thread *DELETED*
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Sex Slave Trader
Registered: 01/12/05
Posts: 1342
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Post deleted by Random
Fuckin' double post.
_________________________
"Bornyo sleeps under a bearskin that he killed and skinned when he was 5. He just stared the thing dead with mind bullets." - Floofin
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#111862 - 07/26/05 06:30 AM
Why pornography needs to exist....
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Porn Jesus
Registered: 01/02/05
Posts: 5750
Loc: ATLANTIC CITY
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It serves to prevent specimens like the above Sloth-o Sapien from reproducing, instead allowing the impulse-driven creature to relieve the sexual instinct by imagining his over-stretched sweat socks are actually a female vagina (such as Kinzie Kenner's), thus harmlessly relasing his otherwise hazardous spermatozoa into the environment. Someone needs to forward this thread to the DOJ to have them re-think the whole "war on obscenity".... FYI -- I have not begun my invasion of ADT yet ... I am waiting for refill time first week of August or thereabouts.
_________________________
Are you gonna eat that?
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#111865 - 07/26/05 07:46 PM
Re: AC Cream tribute thread
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Max Hardcore Prison Bitch
Registered: 06/03/05
Posts: 368
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Quote:
Zartyr?
That's funny Cleetus
To those of you who have not read Zartyr's posts, he's definitely in a world of his own. Quite possibly the strangest poster at ADT and I don't mean that in a good sense. I'd say that he would be a good target for trolling over there but it seems like Steph is killing threads like there's no tomorrow. She's become so paranoid that almost anything that is even slightly politically incorrect or controversial is the work of a troll and subsequently kills the thread.
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#111866 - 07/26/05 08:01 PM
Re: AC Cream tribute thread
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Porn Jesus
Registered: 04/17/04
Posts: 6005
Loc: travieso capital management an...
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i've come to like him, you'd have to watch him for a while to see the true austrian come out but it's there. every now and then he'll say something so profoundly evil about the dynamics of rape or right of the germanic tribes to rule europe steph yells at him for having a low opinion of women and some french person freaks out and says something like "you wicked brutes will never change" to him.
_________________________
"She has no waist, no arse...an interesting face...but all we are really worshipping is two bags of silicone"
Martin Amis "honoring" katie price with a character bearing some of her traits
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#111868 - 07/26/05 10:18 PM
Re: AC Cream tribute thread
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Porn Jesus
Registered: 04/17/04
Posts: 6005
Loc: travieso capital management an...
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i love that some guy blatantly admitted to ripping pariah off. yet there's no problem, because he's "mean" so stealing from him is fair game. where's hans burger when you need him?
_________________________
"She has no waist, no arse...an interesting face...but all we are really worshipping is two bags of silicone"
Martin Amis "honoring" katie price with a character bearing some of her traits
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#111869 - 07/26/05 10:58 PM
Re: AC Cream tribute thread *DELETED*
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Gay For Pay
Registered: 02/04/05
Posts: 1024
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Quote:
Zartyr?
Damn! That's a low blow  Ever since the Euro Lefty professed to being a proud member of the Holy Roman Empire, I'm all for a Line Backer III air campaign over Austria 
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#111870 - 08/04/05 10:40 PM
Re: AC Cream tribute thread *DELETED*
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Porn Jesus
Registered: 08/09/06
Posts: 9113
Loc: red dirt state of mind
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A Quote to resurect this fun thread this quote is from Cindi Loftus in chat this very night. She will be on her way to the porn convention in miami in the morning. <Cindi_Loftus> AC is meeting me to carry my stuff up to my room....... Doesn't that say it all? 
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#111872 - 08/07/05 11:34 PM
Re: AC Cream tribute thread *DELETED*
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Max Hardcore Prison Bitch
Registered: 01/24/05
Posts: 326
Loc: Fort Lauderdale, FL
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A Quote to resurect this fun thread this quote is from Cindi Loftus in chat this very night. She will be on her way to the porn convention in miami in the morning. <Cindi_Loftus> AC is meeting me to carry my stuff up to my room....... Doesn't that say it all? What it says is that AC is a gentleman who doesn't want me to have to carry my luggage up to my room all by myself. That's what it says. Amazes me that you can take a positive and try to make it sound like a negative 
_________________________
Good people will do good things. Bad people will do bad things. But for good people to do bad things you must add religion.
Steven weinberg Nobel prize winner in physics
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#111874 - 08/08/05 04:27 AM
Re: AC Cream tribute thread *DELETED*
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Porn Jesus
Registered: 08/09/06
Posts: 9113
Loc: red dirt state of mind
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Quote:
What it says is that AC is a gentleman who doesn't want me to have to carry my luggage up to my room all by myself. That's what it says. Amazes me that you can take a positive and try to make it sound like a negative
What it says to me is restraining order in the making. Do you carry? Are you packing? If I were you i would definitely consider it. But hey, it's your life. Some people like BASE jumping or skydiving or bungee jumping. So you like baiting possible stalkers no ones gonna begrudge you your thrills. Best of luck.
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