Panzer food

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There is neither mango nor pineapple in it, Panzie. No "fruit" of any kind.


Ingredients
Scotch Bonnet peppers, mustard, salt, onion, vinegar, tumeric & sugar.

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^^^That would be in the Panzie French Cuff Accessories thread.

This the Panzie Food thread.

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Dude, you're going to be fatter than me, and that ain't good.

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Sorry no idea what you are talking about. Gancinies??

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There is neither mango nor pineapple in it, Panzie. No "fruit" of any kind.

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Har!

Close, but the actual answer is:






Pa-pay-a.

Pa-pay-a.

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Good God...

It appears that any ONE of those items could serve as a guilty pleasure, and would be assuaged by having a salad of vegetables on the same plate, but...no...

it's a Holocaust of consumption...

...a Hiroshima of fat...

the horror....

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And the last pic's meal I topped off with these Arizona nachos. They were sold for a $1.00, but now they are $1.50 and I am not happy with this 50% price increase.

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^^^^ I don't care if those chips are free, I'll pass.

That DOES NOT look the least bit appetizing, Panzie.

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The line at the Hilton Sports Book is 5-2 Panzer doesn't make his 33rd birthday.

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There is real meat inside:

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Mountain Rush:

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Why do you use envelopes as place mats?

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omggggg what did you do to those mushrooms

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Seriously...looks like they've been regurgitated.

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"Deep-Fried Chicken Gizzards w/Sweet & Sour Sauce"

Res Ipsa Loquitor...

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I had to look up 'gizzard'. No way I would eat that.

On a brighter note: Panzie never ceases to amaze me.

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I save gizzards and livers in separate freezer-proof containers.

Once you accumulate amounts of same, you make Paul Prudhomme's "Dirty Rice" recipe.

Given the natural accumulation of gizzards/livers, usually have to buy additional gizzards.

The resulting recipe is spicy, crunchy, and funky..

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.... you should use the lid to cut off the Vienna sausage that lurks around somewhere in your size 48 second hand, cinnamon skid print whiteys... then feed it to your sad. lonely miserable lardy self just because it's free. You didnt know? ... that can's lid has so many uses to it. It's free!! AND TOTALLY fanfuckingtastic!

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Use the lid to off your snotlings.

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even that you buy generic? If they aren't Haribo they just dont taste the same.

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Please say you at least heat it up and dont go all housing project and it right from the can cold? You do eat alot of shit hehehehe, and to buy the Key Food brand must be 100x worst, Ive never eaten that, and never will. For shame on you.

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And this is the favorite meal of people that live in Switzerland:

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How about showing us some pix of the fruits and vegetables that you eat, Alex?

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Here's one of the fruits.

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Canned Lasagna: the favorite meal of Jesus Christ:

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Gotta eat those with guacamole, sour cream, and salsa roja. Represents the three colors of Mexico's bandera nacional and is the perfect complement.

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lemme guess... tranny implants, tranny semen (w/gravy), and tranny cock?

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Are you trying to seduce Panzer with that cock in your AV? It would probably be easier if you just bought him some Chef Boyardee's Lasagna and some generic soda to wash it down.Hope you boys have fun.

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Are you trying to seduce Panzer with that cock in your AV?

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I think you might need counseling if everything is a phallic symbol to you.You might be suffering from Corndog Fixation.Get help man before it's too late.

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But it's Italian, how can you go wrong.

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Here you go Panzer. Italian bowels with sauce !

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What?! No sauteed liver!!! That stuff is not cheap by the way.

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Tripe, liver and any innards are the most disgusting thing ever...kidneys, gizzards, that is what is fed to Dogs on the RAW diet. Not humans.

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The gizzards are best when they are deep-fryed and served with sweet-n-sour sauce and the liver it is best when it is sauteed in a small (finger-size) strips

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The last time I saw something that looked like that, it was in the toilet and I thought I had liver failure.

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They look like week old dog turds.

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Nah, they more look like your face

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They look like week old dog turds.

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Panzer, if you worked food service, they'd make you wear a hair net for your entire body.

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Where are you getting the dough for these garlic knots and cinnamon sticks? This looks suspiciously like something also from a can or an aluminized cardboard tube.

For all your kvetching about this or that "ripoff" and your crowing about various so-called bargains you've found, you should be advised that baking bread costs just pennies -- *if* you start from a bag of flour, some yeast and some salt.

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Nah, thats the dough that I made myself, I just screwed up with the yeast and it was kinda like a sourdough. The recipe did not specified the exact amount of yeast, so I thought - the more the better . But yeah, it comes up very cheap it terms of making it by yourself as opposed to buying it in store. For 10lbs of flour I paid $2.98 and for these garlic knots and the cinnamon sticks I only used 2 and 1/2 cups of flour. I wanted to bake the french baguette right now but some neighbor woman complained earlier that my night baking session was keeping her awake whole night, so I will bake the bread tommorow in the morning.

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Less yeast and a longer fermentation time will give the dough a better flavor. For New York style pizza or garlic knots, I usually form the dough into balls and place them in large ziplock bags in the fridge for 3+ days. Let them come to room temp for at least 2 hours prior to baking. I'm not going to get into Neapolitan style dough because your oven doesn't get hot enough to make anything decent.

If you're going to make any actually pizza, get a pizza stone. And let your oven heat up at the highest setting for about an hour with the stone in the oven. For pizza, you want to use a really hot oven and a short baking time. The hot temp will cause the dough to spring up when you place the pizza on the stone. The short baking time will keep it from drying out. For a home oven, you might want to add some honey or olive oil to the dough recipe to help it to brown faster at a lower temperature. This will also help to keep your garlic knots from looking like pale turds.

Also, you are using real butter & real minced garlic, right?

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That butter recipe,,Very nice..!

Al when you roll out your dough for your Wheel [pizza] put a little dusting of cornmeal down..It will give the crust a nice texture[ Don't worry its cheap,, and a small bag will last you along time]..

I won't say much because i think Steezo has this one covered..

But i will be following intently...!

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Restaraunts wil have different variations,,but Corn meal is good enough for you.

This is one of your pizza's you posted a pic of..You see that stuff on the crust.. Corn meal Dude..!

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Alex, because it's more resilient (why do you think the kernels make it all the way through your colon?) and has a higher scorching temperature than wheat flour, cornmeal is used as a kind of "bread lube" to keep the bread off the pizza stone or the masonry floor of your oven. It reduces the surface area of the glutinous (and therefore) sticky bread dough in contact with the stone.

Cornmeal is also hell on wheels for battering pieces of fish and/or chicken before you deep-fry them. You like deep-fried bits of mystery meat, right Alex? That alone should get you interested to buy a bag of cornmeal.

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A basic one-pound bag should be between $1.49 and $1.99 at the supermarket, I'd guess. But I don't know New York prices. If you let yourself get talked into fancy-pants blue cornmeal (which is not all that exotic in the Southwest) you might spend $10.00 a pound.

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Semolina is for pussies. It's just "wheat meal". Do you want the real deal like grits (made from corn) or shit food like cream of wheat (semolina)? No man would pick cream of wheat over grits.

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Do you have a pizza peel? It's that wooden thing they use to slide the pizzas in and out of the oven. If not, get one. You leave the pizza stone in the oven all the time and use the peel slide it on and off the pizza stone.

And don't buy cornmeal. It's gritty and gross. Get semolina and spread it lightly all over the pizza peel before you put the spread out dough on top of it. The semolina acts like tiny ball bearings that let the pizza roll off of the peel easily. If you aren't using a pizza peel, there's no reason to use either cornmeal or semolina. And as long as your oven & pizza stone are hot enough, the pizza should never stick to the stone.

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Pizza is made of mostly fucking wheat (ie. flour). You ever eat a corn pizza? Semolina doesn't alter the flavor of the pizza much and it doesn't leave big gritty chunks of corn on the bottom of the pizza. If he were capable of using just flour, I would recommend dusting the peel with flour. But that isn't going to be happening any time soon.

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They put fucking ham and eggs on pizza too. Which is something I could only picture Panzer doing if he wanted to start a thread titled "Now that's Italian!"

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[Semolina's expensive.

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I don't have a pizza peel, my range/oven is only 24" wide and the oven lid does not opens all the way down because of my tiny kitchen. But I got one of those cake throwels.

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The gas range can be moved -- you simply need a longer hose for the gas input. Pick up your countertop, slide the existing cabinets down into the space where the range used to be, and plop the range on the other end of the cabinets so's you can open the door

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Alex, you're not stuck with the location of that gas range. Just because a moron installed it in the wrong place doesn't mean you're stuck with it.

The gas range can be moved -- you simply need a longer hose for the gas input. Pick up your countertop, slide the existing cabinets down into the space where the range used to be, and plop the range on the other end of the cabinets so's you can open the door.

While it's out, strip that fucker down and clean it. A range ought to be thoroughly cleaned every six months. In your photos there's grease and whatnot dripping down into the nether reaches of the gap between the range and the cabinets. Clean it up!

This would be a good opportunity to clean up all the accumulated gunk and schmutz piled up behind your range and cabinets. And to spray down pesticides to kill the insects undoubtedly living there. Pull that shit out, murder the bugs and sweep their little corpses up a day later.

You'll need new gas hose clamps on both ends of your new, longer gas hose. Don't try to re-use the old, rotten and corroded ones.

Now, New York is wildly overregulated. You probably need five or six permits, a government overseer, and four union goons to help you do all this.

At the end of the day, though, you'll have an oven you can actually use, and a little encouragement to live like an actual human being. Step into the light, Alex!

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Are you trying to get this motherfucker to kill himself? "Panzer blowed up real good."

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I've been over at Sears today and they have really good ovens there, all kinds of oven, like 3 ovens in 1 oven with all kinds of drawers and things. They also had nice fridges and feezers, like a chest freezer that can be used to store ice cream and popsicles.

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Sears is a good place to purchase appliance and tools.

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"If you like pooh enchiladas...and getting caught in the rain"

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Luxurious Ice Cream that I made:

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"If you like pooh enchiladas...and getting caught in the rain"

Lyric from the "Penis Colonic" song ???

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This was the first pizza I made, The Turd Pizza:

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I'm in Illinois. They actually sell the pizza in my area... and have since I was a kid. Its not too bad... but its better if you add your own cheese to it. It doesn't come with much. It comes with dough, sauce, cheese and no toppings. You really need to add other things to it. Still, its good when you add what you want to it.

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I guess that it makes it taste better if you tweak it to your tastes. I gotta make somekind of new pizza stuff, like pizza fingers: fingers with pizza baked right in them, or something like that. I also gotta make soft pretzels, that Auntie Anne woman makes a shitload of moolah with her pretzels and shit.

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1st I gotta make the right dough, last time the bread turned out to be a sourbread.

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The lowest is $0.88 and the highest is $1.69.

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Yesterday I bought 10 cans of different Boyardees. 2 of them were these Mac & Cheese, and since not a lot of stores stock them I decided to give them a try. This stuff does not tastes good so I threw the remains down the toilet, will return the unopened can and will try to get Chef Boyardee company to reimburse me the money for this product that I did not liked:

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Chicken noodle soup with pepperoni slices

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Chicken noodle soup with pepperoni slices:

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God G that trumps anything Panzer has ever posted including the infamous turd pic at ADT !

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Oh my god..!

I don't feel good...After seeing that

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Get well get well soon

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I do not believe that pizza was actually from Japan. There is neither sweet corn nor mayonnaise topping the pizza. All pizzas in Japan are desecrated thus, ergo that "Japanese" pizza is a fraud.

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My friend is in Japan and sent me a pic of the pizza at a party he's at. Straight up Panzer shit.

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Fancy bananna with Venetian primo sauce:

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Pancakes in bacon?

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alex, any thanksgiving creation?

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Please identify the food. I can't make much of anything out.

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A close-up:

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What were you drinking that's green? Mountain Dew?

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Chicken with Sweet Chili Sauce:

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Why does the chicken look ass-raped?

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That's just how they are:

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Red Baron Deluxe Pizza:

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Is it the Special Deluxe? If it isn't the Special Deluxe you are not getting your moneys worth. I saw them at the store for $3.33 this weekend. How much did you pay?

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^^^Why would you have a spatula in your bedroom? Wait, never mind on second thought I don't want to know.

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I use it as a fly swatter because there are some fruit flies.

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And is that a pube I see nestled between your ethernet/USB cable combo?

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Most likely yes.

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Do you really have a father?

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Whom do you think he inherited his love of trannies from??

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I have those pickled banana pepper rings.

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I love those!!



Tell me it's NOT ketchup or beet juice on your pancakes. I know you and ketchup & Russians in general and beets.

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Mt. Olive is the best brand, the B&G brand is lower quality, I also gotta try Vlasic.

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Mt. Olive is very good. At the moment I'm using Shoprite's. They are excellent. Snap nice and hot. Never used Vlasic version.

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That's the Black Cherry syrup and there is also Vanilla syrup on the pancakes, both by U-Bet.

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HA! My uncle used to be a U-Bet distributor. We used to have lots of Chocolate & Cherry around. I used to like mixing my own sodas with syrup and seltzer when I was a kid.

That vanilla makes a great Cream soda.

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I have a soda siphon, but I am kinda cheap on the Co2 cartridges

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Panzer, have you ever eaten a vegetable?

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He went down on his mother, so, yes.

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Fuck that was funny Jim

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All of these things.


The stuff on the right is hot dog salad dressing. The whole page is worth a look Alex.

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Honestly, I don't think even Panzer would make the shite from that link.

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