Funniest Porn Star Names

Posted by: Danno77

Funniest Porn Star Names - 01/19/07 01:02 PM

I'm sure we could go on for days with this topic. There are plenty of funny and odd monikers people choose for their stage names. I think the name Arnold Schwarzenpecker is one of the funniest. So, I decided to make a little video dedicated to the "Sperminator" I don't know the code for posting the video on here, so here is a link to it. Enjoy it!
http://video.google.com/videoplay?docid=7966066136967018049&hl=en
Posted by: k1ng

Re: Funniest Porn Star Names - 01/19/07 01:45 PM

Does anybody know who the second girl is? The one after Hillary Scott.
Posted by: Danno77

Re: Funniest Porn Star Names - 01/19/07 02:35 PM

Her name is Nikki Grind.
Posted by: k1ng

Re: Funniest Porn Star Names - 01/19/07 02:36 PM

thank you, sir
Posted by: loopnode

Re: Funniest Porn Star Names - 01/19/07 02:42 PM

Hi King.
Posted by: k1ng

Re: Funniest Porn Star Names - 01/19/07 02:54 PM

Sweet, at least I'm consistent.
Posted by: Holly Randall

Re: Funniest Porn Star Names - 01/19/07 04:43 PM

One of my favorites was "Ready Prince Jr".
Posted by: MoronBoy

Re: Funniest Porn Star Names - 01/19/07 05:32 PM

So, how long before Gov. Schwarzenegger starts a lawsuit against this guy for trying to steal his identity?
Posted by: faceblaster

Re: Funniest Porn Star Names - 01/19/07 06:03 PM

Quote:

So, how long before Gov. Schwarzenegger starts a lawsuit against this guy for trying to steal his identity?



Schwartzenpecker has been doing porn since before the governator was a kindergarden cop. I think it is best ignored by the gov. Besides, the guy really does look like Ahnold.
Posted by: gia jordan

Re: Funniest Porn Star Names - 01/19/07 06:05 PM

I saw Shwartzenpecker at Whole Foods once and he had some healthy selections in his bag. Fresh veggies, fruit, organic meats...take note, guys.
Posted by: 6655321

Re: Funniest Porn Star Names - 01/19/07 06:15 PM

Quote:

I saw Shwartzenpecker at Whole Foods once and he had some healthy selections in his bag. Fresh veggies, fruit, organic meats...take note, guys.


whole foods is heaven... i cannot stand having to go to these tiny little ghettoized health food stores here in the "sawth" .. the nearest whole foods is an hour away.
Posted by: Holly Randall

Re: Funniest Porn Star Names - 01/19/07 06:21 PM

Quote:

Quote:

I saw Shwartzenpecker at Whole Foods once and he had some healthy selections in his bag. Fresh veggies, fruit, organic meats...take note, guys.


whole foods is heaven... i cannot stand having to go to these tiny little ghettoized health food stores here in the "sawth" .. the nearest whole foods is an hour away.



Whole foods is my favorite store, I could wander around in there forever. Of course it's always a ridiculous total when you hit the cash register. I love how a thread about porn star names leads to discussions of grocery stores. Sorry to aid in hijacking this thread.
Posted by: 6655321

Re: Funniest Porn Star Names - 01/19/07 06:36 PM

Quote:

Quote:

Quote:

I saw Shwartzenpecker at Whole Foods once and he had some healthy selections in his bag. Fresh veggies, fruit, organic meats...take note, guys.


whole foods is heaven... i cannot stand having to go to these tiny little ghettoized health food stores here in the "sawth" .. the nearest whole foods is an hour away.



Whole foods is my favorite store, I could wander around in there forever. Of course it's always a ridiculous total when you hit the cash register. I love how a thread about porn star names leads to discussions of grocery stores. Sorry to aid in hijacking this thread.



LOL its true, we usually cant walk out of whole foods spending less than $200. When In LA i do most of my shopping there, Gelsons, and my bi-weekly trips to little tokyo for groceries from there.

Bah, this thread was destined for hijacking.
Posted by: faceblaster

Re: Funniest Porn Star Names - 01/19/07 09:33 PM

We call it whole paycheck foods.

Schwartzy eats a lot of suppliments too.
Posted by: cheeseface

Re: Funniest Porn Star Names - 01/22/07 08:18 PM

Hollie Day
Posted by: Willie D

Re: Funniest Porn Star Names - 01/22/07 09:28 PM



Spontaneous Xtasy
Lil Bit More
Very Knotty (from the 1970s)
Hypnotiq
Menage Trois

Posted by: Uomo Grassissimo!!

Re: Funniest Porn Star Names - 01/22/07 09:46 PM

Little Trouble Maker

[aka Sarah Blake]
Posted by: js4864

Re: Funniest Porn Star Names - 01/24/07 04:32 PM

Jennifer Loves Spuey
Posted by: MikeSouth

Re: Funniest Porn Star Names - 01/24/07 04:45 PM


okey this goes way back

Khamir Ubitch
Posted by: Deuce_Bigalow

Re: Funniest Porn Star Names - 01/24/07 06:07 PM

Strokahontas

http://profile.myspace.com/index.cfm?fuseaction=user.viewprofile&friendid=46895642

Posted by: Mike Meatmaster

Re: Funniest Porn Star Names - 01/31/07 12:07 PM

Isn't there a girl who goes by 99? What is this Get Smart?
Posted by: Calvin

Re: Funniest Porn Star Names - 01/31/07 12:13 PM

Before she became Cherry Mirage, "Stryc-9" was one of my favorites.
Posted by: gia jordan

Re: Funniest Porn Star Names - 02/01/07 02:15 AM

There used to be a girl at Jim South's named Molestya. I shit you not.

Presley Maddox and I once sat around wishing someone would name herself Crystal Meth.
Posted by: Uomo Grassissimo!!

Re: Funniest Porn Star Names - 02/01/07 02:55 AM

Quote:

Presley Maddox and I once sat around wishing someone would name herself Crystal Meth.



She would have to be smoking hot!

:badjokerimshot:
Posted by: anthropophobiac

Re: Funniest Porn Star Names - 02/01/07 04:36 AM

What about Cara Lott? Her real name is Giva Chitt btw..

(Wow, that was lame...)
Posted by: faceblaster

Re: Funniest Porn Star Names - 02/01/07 12:34 PM

My second choice for my stage name was Dick Snotslinger.
Posted by: 6655321

Re: Funniest Porn Star Names - 02/01/07 01:38 PM

Quote:

My second choice for my stage name was Dick Snotslinger.



I still wanna go by Rob Rocket.... but the threats of divorce, being committed, etc. will never let that be.
Posted by: Bornyo

Re: Funniest Porn Star Names - 02/01/07 02:00 PM

Quote:

Quote:

My second choice for my stage name was Dick Snotslinger.



I still wanna go by Rob Rocket.... but the threats of divorce, being committed, etc. will never let that be.



Not to mention you'd need at least an average-sized and functional dick for it to make sense.
Posted by: Uomo Grassissimo!!

Re: Funniest Porn Star Names - 02/01/07 02:00 PM

Quote:

Quote:

My second choice for my stage name was Dick Snotslinger.



I still wanna go by Rob Rocket.... but the threats of divorce, being committed, etc. will never let that be.



Do you remember "Ricky the Rocket"?

A Night in Heaven

Posted by: MoronBoy

Re: Funniest Porn Star Names - 02/01/07 02:04 PM

Quote:

I still wanna go by Rob Rocket....



Sounds like a generic pro-wrestling name for a cruiser-weight with a high-flying approach to his ring work.
Posted by: Conky

Re: Funniest Porn Star Names - 02/01/07 02:07 PM

Quote:


Spontaneous Xtasy
Lil Bit More
Very Knotty (from the 1970s)
Hypnotiq
Menage Trois





Willie, wasn't it "Spantaneous" rather than Spontaneous. I seem to recall she couldn't even get that right.

If you really want shit porn names, you have to look at the white trash or the black chicks. They always came up with the goods. These days, girls just seem to add an 'i' to the end of their name and consider that to be good enough. No one tries anymore...
Posted by: Uomo Grassissimo!!

Re: Funniest Porn Star Names - 02/01/07 02:20 PM

Quote:

These days, girls just seem to add an 'i' to the end of their name and consider that to be good enough. No one tries anymore...



In the video '80s they just put "Lynn" on a name and ran with it. Now it seems Presley is very popular.
Posted by: agentspits

Re: Funniest Porn Star Names - 02/01/07 02:29 PM

Quote:

Quote:

So, how long before Gov. Schwarzenegger starts a lawsuit against this guy for trying to steal his identity?



Schwartzenpecker has been doing porn since before the governator was a kindergarden cop. I think it is best ignored by the gov. Besides, the guy really does look like Ahnold.



haha ya he does look like arnold, i saw him one time on a porn set and had to look twice like wtf
Posted by: Calvin

Re: Funniest Porn Star Names - 02/01/07 07:28 PM

Quote:

Quote:

These days, girls just seem to add an 'i' to the end of their name and consider that to be good enough. No one tries anymore...



In the video '80s they just put "Lynn" on a name and ran with it. Now it seems Presley is very popular.




"Lynn" was a brand for a while. Amber and Ginger created it, then Micky and Porshe extended it. Like any brand, though, it was eventually overused and lost its meaning. It takes balls for a newbie to add "Lynn" to their last name, and balls are not a good thing for a whore to possess.

Never seen a scene of hers, but "Jamie Fuckingham" always seemed like a pretty good choice.

"Porn Star Name Generator" uses a childhood pet as a first name, and a childhood street name for the last. "Savage Taitwood" is what that gives me. Tweak it to "Taintwood" just for the fuck of it.
Posted by: Uomo Grassissimo!!

Re: Funniest Porn Star Names - 02/02/07 12:19 AM

Quote:

"Lynn" was a brand for a while. Amber and Ginger created it, then Micky and Porshe extended it.



Micky claimed on her "first amateur" video to have gone to the high school where I live now which partially explains my fascination with her. I know a couple of years ago she used to "escort" but the last time I saw her site that was gone.



To Weehawken High's Micky Lynn!!


Posted by: Vizzle

Re: Funniest Porn Star Names - 02/02/07 07:39 AM

Quote:

Quote:


Spontaneous Xtasy
Lil Bit More
Very Knotty (from the 1970s)
Hypnotiq
Menage Trois





Willie, wasn't it "Spantaneous" rather than Spontaneous. I seem to recall she couldn't even get that right.

If you really want shit porn names, you have to look at the white trash or the black chicks. They always came up with the goods. These days, girls just seem to add an 'i' to the end of their name and consider that to be good enough. No one tries anymore...



You're correct, it is actually Spantaneeus...



Black chicks have the best porn names, a lot of times they're only one word, and usually have to deal with food.

Posted by: anthropophobiac

Re: Funniest Porn Star Names - 02/02/07 09:04 AM



Ugly screw-ons: Check!
Stupid horseface: Check!
Gangbang "world record": Check!
Posted by: Vizzle

Re: Funniest Porn Star Names - 02/02/07 10:09 AM

Quote:



Ugly screw-ons: Check!
Stupid horseface: Check!
Gangbang "world record": Check!




I'll bet her daddy's proud.
Posted by: Conky

Re: Funniest Porn Star Names - 02/02/07 12:26 PM

I checked the LA directory, but there's no listing for a "Mr. Xtasty"

Fucking 'Xtasty'? As in, "I used to be tasty, but not now".

Still, I'd probably hit it because my self-loathing knows no bounds.
Posted by: Willie D

Re: Funniest Porn Star Names - 02/02/07 08:50 PM

Quote:

I checked the LA directory, but there's no listing for a "Mr. Xtasty"

Fucking 'Xtasty'? As in, "I used to be tasty, but not now".

Still, I'd probably hit it because my self-loathing knows no bounds.


Don't forget the pushups.
Posted by: lee_11

Re: Funniest Porn Star Names - 02/02/07 08:53 PM





I still wanna go by Rob Rocket.... .



Wasn't he the bass player in 'Poison'?
Posted by: 6655321

Re: Funniest Porn Star Names - 02/02/07 10:42 PM

i think that your looking for rikki rocket.
Posted by: k1ng

Re: Funniest Porn Star Names - 02/02/07 10:47 PM

Rocky Rickets
Posted by: 6655321

Re: Funniest Porn Star Names - 02/02/07 10:54 PM

Rickety Bridge
Posted by: Calvin

Re: Funniest Porn Star Names - 02/02/07 11:05 PM

Lickety Split
Posted by: elaborator

Re: Funniest Porn Star Names - 02/02/07 11:11 PM

Stingy Vagina
Posted by: Crucifixio

Re: Funniest Porn Star Names - 02/02/07 11:35 PM

Spantaneeus (along with Kitty Fox) actually had a cameo in Matthew Bright's Freeway. You know, the movie with Reese Witherspoon...

Wasn't Shay Sights' man named MILES LONG?

I never thought CHERRY POPPENS was the brightest name. I loved the shit out of their scenes but SID DEUCE and ANNA MALLE were horrible stage names. You had chicks like HONNEY BUNNY and FOXY LADY. RED HEAVEN and PASON were equally stupid. LIL SINDERELLA (who had a cameo in Boogie Nights, IIRC. There's so many...I think the vast majority of names are funny but we get used to them over time. I mean, how silly is CYTHEREA?

Even if I don't necessarily like the performers, I'm starting to favor the Euro names: Anita Dark, Niki Dark, Angel Dark, Nikki Blonde, Anita Blonde, Julie Silver, Stacy Silver (no relation to Alexis or Selena), Sharka Blue, Sarah Blue (no relation to Alektra, Anastasia, Ashley, Violet or Vanessa), Sue Diamond, Black Diamond, Simony Diamond, Mya Diamond, (no relation to Debi or Gwen), Sonja Redd, Jenna Red...
Posted by: Abe

Re: Funniest Porn Star Names - 02/03/07 12:24 AM

Dick Steel
Girth Vader
Rick Rhino
Posted by: Bornyo

Re: Funniest Porn Star Names - 02/03/07 11:21 AM

Dame Tight
Posted by: lee_11

Re: Funniest Porn Star Names - 02/03/07 02:03 PM

Quote:

i think that your looking for rikki rocket.



I know. It was a joke.
Posted by: Big Calm

Re: Funniest Porn Star Names - 10/29/07 06:51 PM

Kala Prettyman

Good thickness but bad name



Posted by: Uomo Grassissimo!!

Re: Funniest Porn Star Names - 10/30/07 03:04 PM

The first time I heard "Hannah Montana" I thought it was a porn name.
Posted by: the unknown pervert

Re: Funniest Porn Star Names - 10/31/07 07:16 AM

Quote:

The first time I heard "Hannah Montana" I thought it was a porn name.



She's already Billy Ray Cyrus's daughter. How do you get any more shamed than that?
Posted by: moxxie maddron

Re: Funniest Porn Star Names - 10/31/07 05:10 PM

I actually took my daughter and her friend to a Hannah Montana concert last night.
Her name may sound like a porn name, but I think thats one little girl who will not be destroyed and fall apart with her fame. She seems to be pretty solid.
Posted by: Uomo Grassissimo!!

Re: Funniest Porn Star Names - 10/31/07 07:39 PM

Quote:

I think thats one little girl who will not be destroyed and fall apart with her fame. She seems to be pretty solid.




Don't trample my dreams!!


Posted by: faceblaster

Re: Funniest Porn Star Names - 10/31/07 10:05 PM

Quote:

I actually took my daughter and her friend to a Hannah Montana concert last night.
Her name may sound like a porn name, but I think thats one little girl who will not be destroyed and fall apart with her fame. She seems to be pretty solid.



see any great milfs? queen city shoulda had some good ones. how'd you like the jonases?
Posted by: moxxie maddron

Re: Funniest Porn Star Names - 10/31/07 10:55 PM

Come on now!! It would be nice if just ONE of these famous teen girls could stay a good role model for their fans, instead of becoming a totally cracked out trainwreck as they all seem to end up doing.
Posted by: KALLA

Re: Funniest Porn Star Names - 10/31/07 10:55 PM

2 Pretty 4 Porn
The irony of this busted whore's name is always good for a laugh.
Posted by: moxxie maddron

Re: Funniest Porn Star Names - 11/01/07 12:56 AM

Quote:

Quote:

I actually took my daughter and her friend to a Hannah Montana concert last night.
Her name may sound like a porn name, but I think thats one little girl who will not be destroyed and fall apart with her fame. She seems to be pretty solid.



see any great milfs? queen city shoulda had some good ones. how'd you like the jonases?



Lots of milfs, and lots of appreciative dads that had been dragged to the concert by their daughters, checking them out.
The Jonas Brothers were great. They are talented kids, and give a very energetic performance. And they inspired thousands of teen and preteen girl to screen their heads off.
Posted by: Gigi

Re: Funniest Porn Star Names - 11/06/07 03:49 PM

Quote:

The first time I heard "Hannah Montana" I thought it was a porn name.

true fact: one of the early names thrown around for the show was actually "alexis texas." my daughter is obsessed with that show.
Posted by: LouCypher

Re: Funniest Porn Star Names - 11/06/07 04:02 PM

Considering I've been referring to her old man as
"Really Gay Cyress" from day one the rhyming monickers
didn't bother me.

If I were a pornstar my name would be
Meat Waggin .
Clearly this would make me a pr0n Icon and a mainstream/crossover legend.
Posted by: Anonymous

Re: Funniest Porn Star Names - 11/06/07 04:10 PM

Billy Ray Cyrus is her dad? I was watching a show he hosted called "Hillbillies" on the History Channel yesterday. I have never seen so many factual errors on that station in all the years I've had cable. It was embarrassing. Funny, though.
Posted by: Willie D

Re: Funniest Porn Star Names - 11/06/07 04:16 PM

Quote:

"Really Gay Cyress"



aka "Achey-Breakey-Bad-Mistakey"
Posted by: LouCypher

Re: Funniest Porn Star Names - 11/06/07 04:37 PM


Jim B
Quote:

Billy Ray Cyrus is her dad? I was watching a show he hosted called "Hillbillies" on the History Channel yesterday. I have never seen so many factual errors on that station in all the years I've had cable. It was embarrassing. Funny, though.



Heh... Yup he is.
You ever watch TakeHome Chef and expect to see
a knockoff idea in the "Manly Requests" forums ?.
Posted by: loopnode

Re: Funniest Porn Star Names - 11/06/07 05:16 PM

not funny- more like sad.

Whorie Laurie
Plenty Uptopp
Cathy Cumlapper
Lisa Luvcock
Minnie Mouth
Phillipa Pussy
Tina Tits
Seven
Helen Head
Heidi Hoe
Dixie Bubbles
Treasure Chest
Echo Valley
Kayla Kupcakes
Honey Melons
Tippi Topps
B.B. Gunns
Savanna Staxx

soon... Loosy Liu.
Posted by: Vizzle

Re: Funniest Porn Star Names - 11/06/07 07:08 PM

Thunder Katt
Posted by: LouCypher

Re: Funniest Porn Star Names - 11/06/07 07:13 PM

l00per
Quote:

not funny- more like sad.
soon... Loosy Liu.



When I flex the pimp knuckle.. It'll be
Loucey Lu... She'll of course have a LouCrewâ„¢
tramp stamp and all of you meat slappers will line up to empty your gene pool.

Alt porn Hannah Montana names are as follows..

Shiloh Idaho... barely 18 butt you can harvest her bum-spud.

Mona Arizona... Screams like a Banshee when shes taken dry.(or watches a Cardinals game).

Posted by: papercut

Re: Funniest Porn Star Names - 11/06/07 10:20 PM

Quote:

LouCrewâ„¢



loucrew? you fucking faggot.
Posted by: gia jordan

Re: Funniest Porn Star Names - 11/14/07 04:51 AM

I'm waiting for a new whore to name herself Jondra Jenkem.
Posted by: LouCypher

Re: Funniest Porn Star Names - 11/14/07 03:56 PM

pimpleclit
Quote:

Quote:

LouCrewâ„¢



loucrew? you fucking faggot.



I knew that reference would be akin to me blowing a dog whistle..

Somewhere..on the business end of a glory hole.. you'd swallow hard,raise your bullet shaped head and wag your tail. lmao..

Well played puppet.
Posted by: taint1974

Re: Funniest Porn Star Names - 11/14/07 08:15 PM

2 Pretty 4 Porn - the name just screams chick with issues more serious than a normal porn chick.

Green Eyes - how many hours of brainstorming did that one take.
Posted by: oregongaper

Re: Funniest Porn Star Names - 11/16/07 10:07 PM

I got it, i got it.
My porn star name would be
Buck Naked!

one bonus point for knowing where that's from
Posted by: k1ng

Re: Funniest Porn Star Names - 11/16/07 10:18 PM